SeeKer's CorNer

MJ The KING

2009-08-01T22:35:00.003+08:00

This is one of my favourite performance from Michael Jackson. His best, in my perspective.

Enjoy! :)

P.S. Watch in HQ and Don't miss the last part of the gig!

So much in 4 months

2009-07-22T23:27:00.012+08:00

Well, well well... Hello Folks! Miss me?! Actually, I'm wondering if anyone visits this blog anymore. Haha... So much has happened during my blog's hibernation. And I don't really know where to start. Lets start with world news then slowly back to the life of a normal civilian, Me. How about that?

Its the Solar Eclipse today. As I watched the sun slowly devouring the yolk and how so many people across different countries flew all the way to China just to see this brief but major moment, its a wonder how nature works and how it can bring people together. I wonder how it feels driving to work one morning with light slowly fading out, then... total darkness. Must be kinda cool. But all I got today was a cloudy wet morning. Oh well, at least I got to see the eclipse 'Live' on TV today! Try to feel the special moment from far far away as much as I can. Thanks to Ch U! Haha... Nope. I am not advertising.

Before this, there were riots in Xin Jiang that killed many innocent people. Another bombing tragedy just last week in Jakarta that killed MORE people. It seems like people are so sick now that they just enjoy killing one another. They like to blow themselves and others up. Why people these days like blow jobs so much huh? Its just like kids trying to create havoc so that they can catch the attention they need. I really despise such actions. Do whatever, but why involve the innocent?

Another depressing news hit the world when Michael Jackson is pronounced dead. I got the msg in the car from my sis on my way to work. I found it unbelivable and was in shock for some time. The King of POP has left us. How could it be? We won't get to see smooth and sleek dances no more. Nope. No one can be better than MJ. I rememeber I use to listen to his music since i was 4. I recall playing "Thriller" on the tape player feeling scared. But once the music ends, I would rewind the tape and play it all over again. MJ is a genius, not only in dancing but also in producing wonderful music. His music comprises of all genres and so many stories. He reminded us its ok to be BAD sometimes, that there's a SMOOTH CRIMINAL out there somewhere, SCREAM out our frustrations if need be but not forgetting to HEAL THE WORLD when we can. He sang I'LL BE THERE so that we know that whenver we need someone, WE're NOT ALONE, he made us take a good look at one's CHILDHOOD before passing any judgement. MJ has shown us he is indeed the KING. He brought the world together with his music and finally his death. How many has such effect on the world. None other came to my mind. It is rather sad to see the on-going buzz focusing on how screwed up MJ's life was. His debts, his drug abuse, his sexual accusations and the fight to the custody of his children. MJ's death has sadly turned into a circus show. How can the King rest in peace? The curiosity of human is indeed a lethal weapon.

From the KING, we'll move to a Stunt monk. Wow. This is a very "modern" monk indeed. He claims, as a monk in the modern world, he should catch up with the pace of the modern people. So, he lives in an expensive condominium, he drives big cars, he swipe cards like wipe butt with toilet papers, he has properties worth millions all over the world, he is the member of a high social club, he owns horse as a pet, he travels around the world, he stays in 6 star hotels, he uses branded bags, he wears matchsticks watches, he dives and he goes for fake tan!!! You are so formaidable leh, really is "Jing Shui Nen You, Chu Shui Nen Zou" (In water can swim not forgetting dive, on land can walk, actually in sky also can fly, fly until very comfortable somemore. Your seat can stretch, got movies to watch and got games to play one leh). Amazing.... Now now, Stunt Monk, you are making me feel like a caveman already. I had no idea being modern means all the above. You even have a boy toy! I really have to salute you. You more "li hai" than the "organ" man, you make "organ" man's case like a 'pi sai' nia . Its that simple to you isn't it? The cavemen's cash very nice to use hor. You not only thoroughly rip the trust of the people in pieces, crush the hopes of people in need, you also put your religion to shame. Greed, another leathal weapon. Should I add lust too? "She ji shi kong, kong ji shi she"? A mi tuo fo.....

As for me, I went through 5 weddings (just 2 more to go), am in the same work battlefield, moved to farrer park, needs to get use to the new environment (if you know what I mean), still trying to squeeze all my clothes into the teeny wardrobe, got my weeny bonus, played multiple mahjong sessions, watched a dozen movie (I still want to say Harry Potter sucks BIG time, I mean really BIG), still want to slap the fungus (very very much), still in love with my job although I have cursed and sweared umpteen times, life is good but not fantastic, still complains alot, eagerly waiting for the arrival of my godson and YES! I am still single.

And NO! I do not know why Fiona Xie is missing and why she gave up that "big" role. Of course I won't tell you where she is now. Give the girl a break would ya.

By the way...

Welcome Back to Seeker's Corner!

Exhausted

2009-03-20T01:12:00.004+08:00

Work has been simply crazy in the recent months. I'm constantly fighting wars without realising the time whizzing by. TV is enjoyable but it definitely is no joke. I can still bear the workload given the many barriers I have to cross. Becos in the end, I know deep in my heart this is what I enjoy doing and this is where I want to be. BUT, there's this single Mental Mushroom aka "M & M" which I really can't tahan. Spreading it's virus all over and leaving its odour in every part of the plantation is causing a very repulsive energy. It's been some time, and all I see are troubles being brewed leaving the confused soldiers to battle and appease. Where's the contribution? The only contribution so far is more time, energy, efforts and money wasted on non-effective and non-meaningful so-called "Plans". Stop trying to be the Wizard if its only the circus "it" has been to. "M & M" has successfully become my 'Talking-Point' for lunches. I wonder if my counter-parts are tired hearing me bitch about the same plant.

Whatever it is, as exhausted as I may be. I'll make sure I catch a breather or 2. Lunch is Lunch. I enjoy my sessions. Home is Home I'm stuck to my couch & bed. Weekends are Weekends. I indulge in my Play.

But Hey! I was still wokring till 2.30am at home last nite. What The Hell.... Maybe I really need a shoulder to lean on this time round. Don't mind my complaints, may just be a sign that age is catching up.

The Best Is Yet To Come

2009-02-05T01:28:00.002+08:00

永远有一个吻未尝
有些烛光未燃亮
若爱太苦要落糖
吉他断线亦无恙
To hug someone to kiss someone
The best is yet to come
若要错失永不能守
得到也不代表长久
假使快乐有尽头
痛苦也未会不朽
寂寞半点假如不能承受
这生命注定过得不易
笑与泪亦有时候
To hug someone to kiss someone
The best is yet to come
若你说不再听情歌
不想再经历这漩涡
假使抱住你拳头
到底也没法牵手
就是为了追求一时平静
将感情隔离半点感动都扼杀
没法承受
永远有不妥协伤口
有些憾事不放手
若你太刻意淡忘
越会补不到缺口
Why don't you just hug someone
just kiss someone
The best is yet to come
最好的尚未来临

Ouch.

2009-01-10T01:29:00.004+08:00

Company has made an official announcement. A very long email, to cut the crap, it simply means we'll have to go for quite a few "Given Holidays" and Pay will be cut at about 10% every month. Sim Tia...

Less time in office = Work more from Home = Higher home electrical bills = Less Money = Less/No Shopping & Leisure.

jia lak lah like that... We only live to survive now.

Still, its a global problem. We'll just have to tide this through together.

I heard people said, "At least you still manage to keep your job."

Ahhh..... Should I be feeling better? Hmmmm.....

2009! The Best Year.

2009-01-01T03:04:00.005+08:00

2009 is here. Each year seems to be surpassing the speed of the former. I looked back at 2008 and thought about the good and bad things that affected me. It turns out, I can't really remember anything bad. Even my car accident din cross my mind till I went to have a look at my previous posts. So yes, the worst thing that happened last year was the accident. It sucked and it cost me a bomb.

I decided to list the memorable stuff/major effect in life down:

1)Shanghai Blues - This is indeed the most memorable + enjoyable journey. The people, the work. Theres so much passion, love, fun and satisfaction.

2) Wedding Notifications for 2009 of my great buddies(in the order of dates I was informed):

a) Taitai
b) Preeya
c) Rynn
d) Bell

I still do have 6 weddings to attend! Please let there be no more. I cannot afford any additional ang paos.

3) My new job. From Theatre to TV - I heart Theatre but I hunger for my dream. I longed to work for TV and I am there now. This move opened my eyes real wide. Work is complicated. Less love felt More lessons learnt.

4) Australia Trip - Its a simple, relax and happy one.

5) Jasmine and Del's surprise V Day pressie - I was very touched for their efforts.

6) The car accident - I still curse the reckless driver.

I decided to go through a quiet countdown this year. I was switching from channel to channel to watch the different celebrations and there's this sms screen that people text in to. Every greeting was boring, all except for one that caught my eye. It said "I am going to make 2009 my best year." Oh yes. Thats the best NY resolution I have seen. There and then I decided I AM going to make 2009 my best year no matter what happens!

I have made quite a few new frens in 2008, but i realised due to my laziness, I am losing frens as well. I am going to pull them back one by one. I have lots of catching up to do. And I will get to know more new frens too! A new attitude at work is much needed as well.

2009! You ARE going to be my best year! I will make sure of that.

Happy New Year to ALL!

Lots of luv,
Jo

Have a Bite!

2008-12-28T18:38:00.001+08:00

http://ent-bites.blogspot.com/

Back For Reality

2008-11-28T00:33:00.016+08:00

I reckon many feel the same. The post holiday period is not exactly one will fancy. I was away for 10 days and back for only 5, it feels like the other way back round. It's like karma that I have to pay for dumping work out of my face for a while and now its 10 times of what I missed out. Computer reads: "Inbox (200 emails)". It sucks big time. Perth was enjoyable and I literally dragged myself back to this humid land. 5 days before we have to leave, Shimei & I were alreay dreading the idea of going back to work. Anyway.... back to Perth. Before I begin, let me introduce 3 very important members from Jessica's household. (You can pause the music at the bottom of the page if you want.)

Big Sis - Fish!! The smartest, most obedient and coolest dog ever. Aka, shes kinda boring n authistic. hahaha.... But the least worries she gives you. Behold her scream! Believe me, you will go deaf. The tiniest of the 3, but she inputs fear n respect in the other 2 pups.
Best Trick - Please Please!

No. 2 - Lola!! The most lovable dog. She has this tenderness under the thick rough skin. Snores real loud and she's got the coolest tricks!
Check Out her Snore!

The little one - Socks!! The craziest and cheekiest of the 3. Super hyper, cannot stop playing. Loves to disturb everyone especially Lola! Her best fren.
The Chase

This is where I have been staying for the past 10 days. I like the house. Its just the right size and really cosy. Wonder if it's the weather. I love to look into the sky. It somehow calms one. Unexpectedly, We shopped like crazy in Perth. Every shopping centre we stepped in, we ransack. We left Perth without a single Aussie $ left.....My idea was to really chill out and live a wandering time in Perth with no restrictions and time limits. In the end, we were so caught up everyday, apparently it cause me to snore almost every single night. Yes, I snore. I came to find out after loads of complaint from my fren. Its sad news.... I reckon this has made it harder for me to get a partner. Haha...

HarbourTown, Carosel, Garden City & Perth City were the places we spent most of our "mula" ($$)in. There was a day where I really felt like I'm with one of the common auntie tour groups. My sis drove us to Swan Valley, we first head to the Chocolate Factory for some sugar rush, then to the HoneyMaker to resolve my mum's coughing issue, then to the $22 per entry Wildlife Park where there was nothing much to see except for the unusually lazy but cute animals like Koalas & Wombat. I was wondering then that the people there will be really amazed by our Fantastic Singapore Zoo & Night Safari. Next, we wanted to head to the winery for some fine wine. On our way there, Jessie missed a turn and decided to make a 3 point turn at another small turn But! She missed it again because the car behind us was too close. I dunno what got into her head and she ended up driving us into the sand pit. The next thing we know, the car has turned into a Koala. It wouldn't move an inch. Frantic. Me: "F**k...! Why you drive into here?!! What were you thinking?" Jessie: "OMG! I feel so stupid!F**k! " Shimei: Zhen me ban??? Driver remained in the seat flooring the accelerator trying to turn her wheel left & right trying to get out, Passengers ended up giving all our mights to push the antique forward. The wheels turn, Shimei and Me were dusted with sand. The Car wouldn't move.... We were officially stranded on an endless road. A few cars with ang mos passed by jeering. Na bei... Lucky us, a kind hearted Asian man came to our rescue, using his truck and a rope, he pulled us out of the shithole! Wala! Journey continues. We got our wine. Last stop, the most important stop, the Nougart Factory to taste some origins of Aust! Packs of nougarts in our bags and the Smooth Nougart Ice-cream melting in our mouth. We were drained, back to home for some rest.... Drama sia...

Dory, Jessie's housemate brought us to Cottesloe for some tanning. The beach is jus so beautiful. The air is cool, the sand is so fine, the sun shines and the sea is so clear... I think besides the Sunset by the sea in San Francisco, I haven't seen the sea this beautiful. It's got 3 colours! Blue, Light Blue & Green! I love charging into the waves and challenging it. Alot of hot bods by the beach too... Wooooo....
We had an interesting Night Tour of Freyo prison, checked out another side of Perth at Framentle, and we met up with frens over at Perth. Christel says since the move, she has learnt to take things slow. She seems a happy person. And I'm happy for her. Harry is cheerful & nice as ever, its a shame I didn't have more time with them. They are going to build their own house! Wow... And oh! I played 3 nights of Mahjong there too! And I won every night. LOL. I won 16 bucks on Scratchy Card and I lost 60 bucks in the Casino at some fruit wheel game which was rather fun. But... Ouch. No, I am not an addictive gambler.
We had great food throughout the whole week, a few unique restaurants as well, any longer, I swear the plane wouldn't fly. Haha...

Overall, I really enjoyed Perth. Especially, the time with the dogs. Its been the longest time that I haven't touched TV. I only watched 1 DVD out of the 10 days. In which, I think it's an amazing record for a TV addict like me. It's a good place for a breakaway. Wish it was longer. But now I'm back. Back for a reality at the moment. Its time to move on... I still look forward to the next holiday though. Like they say, "You always need another hoilday after a holiday!" And so, I wll work on it. Money!!!!

Short Note: I imagined many many future scenes throughout my life. But never have I imagine this. Me, sleeping soundly in a car my little sis is driving. When I woke up, I realised. My sis has grown up. Shes no longer the rebellious, irritaiting and irresponsible brat. She's an adult and I now have trust in her. Instead of indulging into the freedom of life with possible unacceptable acts, like drugs and ridiclous play, she worked, studied and sort out issues on her own. It's a relief. The decision to finally send her to a foreign land has proven to be right after 3 years. People have asked me, "Don't you feel its unfair that your sis gets to go overseas and not you?" To be honest, I felt it didn't justify for what we once were. But Life works in wonderful ways. And nope, I didn't regret not being headstrong enuff about my decision to US years ago. I enjoyed my schooling days here as well. It has mould me into what I am today. I had wonderful experiences of my own here. So... It's cool. All the best in Sydney Jess! You can make it! You're sneaky in enuff to survive there! Haha... Get a job soon. It's time you contribute to Mom's monthly 4D funds.

Holiday!

2008-11-13T02:13:00.003+08:00

Woo Hoo!!! Finally! My long awaited break is here. Its a fantastic November as I passed 10th November the 27th time. Yup. I'm 27. Darn... Time flies..... No big celebration this year. Just a few good frens for makan and some ktv. Thanks taitai & Michie for making the arrangement. Though it ain't that hard an occasion to organize. Haha.... But I truly appreciate it. Very Thankful indeed to have some of my closest frens around not only now, but also back then and hopefully in future as well.

I didn't demand the presents I want for my Bday like the previous years, becos I simply had no time to think. But the surprises were pretty cool and I love them all!

Will like to thank:

1) Bell, Rynn, SZ & Mery for the Coach Wallet
2) Bell & Rynn for making the efforts to meet me
2) Taitai, Mich & Preeya for the meals & lovely bracelet
3) Pam for the Eye Make up set & necklace
4) Mum & Dad for the Ipod Nano
5) Hmmm.... I wonde what the others are gonna get me. LOL.

This has been the busiest and laziest time of my life. I totally had no plans for my Bday celebration, hadn't organize much meet ups with many frens and I didn't even had the time or energy to really plan and organize my Australia Trip. It really ain't something I would do. To be disorganized. Work has really driven me crazy, really crazy.... It's like all my energy has been sucked out and my IQ meter has gone down to 0 becos all my brain cells has been used up. Yesterday was the ultimate burst and its a good thing that my flight is a few hours away before I punch anyone in the face. Haz!

Anyway, I can hear the Australian Coastline breeze calling out to me and feel the Sun shining too.

See ya mates!

Jo

Different.

2008-09-26T00:47:00.002+08:00

昨晚传了一个生日祝贺的简讯给一位曾经是非常要好的朋友。有些许感触，些许遗憾。。。无论如何我们还是由衷地祝福彼此一切安好。我想有些东西一旦消失，就再也回不到从前了。

Please Welcome Me Back~

2008-09-03T23:52:00.005+08:00

Hi People, it's been long. I had a complaint yesterday that I haven't been blogging for too long hence left people un-entertained. After months of hibernation where laziness deeply seeped into me and took over, a complaint has helped me conquer. And so... I'm back! :D

There were actually much that I wanted to blog about during this period of absence, so where do I start? The opening of Olympics where China made themselves proud and made our mouths dropped? Where the ang mos must be shocked when China displayed a spetacular show telling the World they can do what they want as long as they want to. Leaving Britain quickly "humbly" announcing that their performance will be an intimate one.

How about the table-tennis heroines (not so much of Wang Yue Gu as I wasn't really impressed wif her attitude)who brought Singapore the Glory of Silver? Where Singapore sees new rising stars Feng Tian Wei and Tao Li. Impressive performances and attitude from both and they have become one of the country's most treasured assets. I see people in the office eyes glued to the TVs, sigh when we lost a point, cheer when we score them. The table-tennis games were the only times I felt Singaporeans' Patronism towards the country. I felt it even more than the yearly National Day. But alas! Media has made the table-tennis missing coach for Men's team (whining he could have made it with coach ard, aka he needs milk) a big saga leaving our medals tainted with spots. Is it really necessary for such headlines? Now, everyone's obsessively puzzled with Ms Gong Li's citizenship. But... What has it gotta do with them? She paid, she switched, she has the qualities, she does what she wants. It's not up to us, it's up to the authorities to decide. So what's the big deal? Isn't it a way of telling people that "Hey! Singapore's a good place! U wanna good life it's here! U wanna change to a green card, it starts from here."

Hmmm.... Or shall I talk about the wedding missles? Yes, missles. Not bells, not bombs. But missles. Cos they came in a pack altogether. In this recent 2 months I got news of friends, and May I say close friends getting married in 2009. I have 5 in a row. And at least 3 to be their 'Sisters'. Can you believe it? I can't believe it too, but I accept it. I'm happy for them, though 1 leaves me worried. Hahaha... Dear Rynn, I'm on ur side always! When Taitai first broke the news of the proposal from Martin, I was overwhelmed. So much that i wanted to squeak with happiness when she informed me on MSN in office the other day. Finally! This old/odd couple are getting married. They are odd, cos they luv torturing each other, and Mahjong with them have never been more fun. They pinch each other during a game, laughs at silly jokes of each other and they play Boxing and wrestling at Burger King counter. It's time they torture each other more. Haha... I remember the trip to East Coast where I was struggling wif my blades and I had Martin on the right and Nik on the left supporting me. I shouted, "I'm like a mother with 2 son-in-laws!". Its comical, but hey, I was happy. Somehow feeling warm, just truly glad that my dearest frens found good men (rare apparently).

Or should I talk about my workplace going thru a revamp and I have a New Boss to attend to? She brought hope, but will hope come thru, I'm excited to know....

oh! It ends here. I'll see you around folks.

Btw, 5 weddings.... the idea of spending close to 800 bucks scares me..... Spooky.....

Nope. The boys are not mine.

Are You Perfect?

2008-06-23T23:24:00.007+08:00

Perfect Cut awaits you

Ch U
9th July 08
Mon - Fri 10pm.

Damaged

2008-06-09T12:54:00.011+08:00

Saturday could almost be a perfect day... Headed to Ollie's cafe at Haji Lane for the first time. I like the place and its good to see an old fren. The place is comfy and so chill. I boasted to Jas how I did a parallel parking in less than 1 min when I was there. Who would have thought of this to happen....

We were heading to Suntec for some "Kungfu Panda" after chilling and as I was gonna make a turn, a car zoomed past me on the left from nowhere, I hear a crunch from my car and the next thing I know, I was in the middle of the road with my front bumper flipping open. My heart sank. The 2 gals froze in the car as I drove to the side to confront the dickhead. They were lost in space for a few mins before they realised that they are mobile. The Ass driver, which I would love to mention his name but I can't, went straight past the junction when he was on a lane that only allows a left turn. And he was moving his ass so fast, so fast that IF I had made the turn a few seconds earlier, we would all now be hospitalized with serious injuries. I literally felt like slapping him. Born in a society like this, apparently, I can't. I was raged with anger and started using all my reprimanding skills. He just kept quiet and nodded. Later, he tried to do the denial thing and said he was 'thinking' of turning. If you were turning, you wouldn't have hit me you bastard! It was obvious to me that he had no idea he was on a turning lane. I called my Dad for SOS. And boy, i'm glad he's here. Otherwise, I really wouldn't have known what to do.

As I was writing down my particulars, it was then i realised, i was freaking out. Cos my mind was blocked for a while and my hands were trembling. Fear has crept into me without having me realise it. It was only after 15 mins that it dawned on me to check if Jas and Del were alright. I felt really bad about that.

I was utterly disgusted to know that the asshole shares the same surname and Initial as me. J.Seah. Pui! I so wanted to spit at him. A balding 37 year old nerd with polo tee and high cut jeans. So typical Singaporean Man.... Said his Father told him to leave and as much as I insisted, he left. I realised his gf had left in the midst of confrontation when he left alone. Not like i'm trying to get personal, but really she could have got a better guy with what she got.

It was even more frustrating today when I went to make a report and found out that the asshole/dickhead may not have to pay a single cent. All becos of a new law being set on 1 June. WTH. or rather, WTF. Isn't the law suppose to protect the innocent? Passengers in the car cannot be witnesses, photos of aftermath and where it happened are not considered clear enough evidence to explain the situation. How am I, suppose to stop my car in the middle of the cross juncton, grab strangers as a witnesses and take photos of what happened at that point of time? You tell me. If I did that, I would be choking up the whole of Bras Basah Road, will I be arrested for creating a road hazard then? I was already amazed that I can take photos, take down particulars and confront the bloody driver after shifting the car safely to the side without creating a hazard. The asshole was going so fast by the time he stopped his car he was already 10m away from where he hit me.

As we waited for the tow car to arrive, people are looking at my frens and me as though we were exhibits. We see smiles, we see curious faces, we see people being judegemental, we see weird uncles staring and we see lots of mumblings. Even the whole anti-terrorists squad of about 8 pax stopped to chat and check out what happened. But everything's status quo. Nothing is gonna compensate this. My heart aches as I see my new baby being slowly towed away.

And so, my Saturday is damaged and my car is badly damaged. And yes, we are alright. We were lucky to have escaped unhurt. That's the only thing I can console myself with. Thank God.

Great Singapore Sale! Chionggg Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!

2008-05-26T23:38:00.004+08:00

Oh Yes! It's here, and I heard its the best so far. To compensate my not so wonderful mood, I decided to immerse myself into some retail therapy. And oh Boy... It worked well. After much bugging from Miss Tan, we went on to conquer VivoCity last Saturday.

Before I head out for war, a few things to check on:

1) Comfortable and Easy to remove Top, Bottom and Shoes (Nope, not sloppy but casual). [CHECKED]
2) Light Make-up. (Although you are out to some pushing and shoving with the women, you still have to look fresh and good). [CHECKED]
3) A loaded wallet. (You don't want to end up not being able to buy what you want) [CHECKED]
4) A hearty Lunch! You need a full stomach to tahan the long hours. [CHECKED]
5) Plan your route. (Head to shops you know you will get something in)[CHECKED]
6) Ready for battle! [Chionggg!]

Result:

7 hours of shopping and we only manage to cover a quarter of the place. Whining on how broke we are and how much we have sinned in the MRT on our way back home. The one who nagged me to shop with her only spent half of what I splurged on. I got myself 6 tops 1 dress and 1 bottom. When I got home, I got anothr 5 tops and 1 bottom! Mummy went shopping too and got me beautiful stuff! Awwww..... *Love Love* The next thing I know, I was exhibiting all my precious to my parents.

The very next day, I got this SMS from Miss Tan:

"A. I watched news and this year sales are good. They interviewed people and they also said during sales can buy more to keep ma. Like us. So when is our next shopping heehee."

Women...

Oh! My reply:

"Sure! Will arrange again."

Women....

123我们都是木头人

2008-04-21T23:29:00.003+08:00

From the name of David Tao’s concert, it is obvious what he wants to showcase in his concert. Just simply his music.
Tao kept his words on the 3 “No”.

1) No Guest Singer
2) No Dancing
3) No Stripping

Not much visual effects, not many surprises. Just a Solid Voice, a Multi-talented Band and Quality Music with a clear message.

The concert kicked off with display of animations on how humans evolved from apes.It is clear that Tao is reminding us how simple we humans were. I was rather impressed with the visuals, very sleek. In fact, the visuals on screen are very much the only element that satisfies one’s eyes in this concert. Tao’s ‘live’ is really no difference from what you hear on CD. He sounds great either way. The band he has is a solid one and almost every member has the ability to cut a vocal album (almost half of them are from Singapore mind you). One of the backup singers can play more than 3 instruments. She played the trombone, violin, flute and I forgot what else. Each time the lights lit up on her, we see something new in her hands. Both backup singers were given time to shine on stage, they were given the opportunity to sing a number of ballads with Tao. And everytime they did, Mich will be gritting her teeth and making lots of noise. With folded arms and face of charcoal, “I’m jealous! Hrmph!”. It got worse when he wrapped his arms around the 2 gals as they groove to the lovey dovey songs. Tao tweaked the tunes of most of his songs, although it took me some time to figure out which songs they were till very much near the chorus, I must say, Tao has the ability to perform them with such conviction. I bet those who heard the song for the first time would have thought this is the way the songs originally sound. And they are wonderful. There is a part of the concert which I really liked too. It’s like a short musical, pre-lude of 《今天你要嫁给我》, the drums of Indian music then Arabic singing, belly dancers started sprouting and dancing around Tao, stopping him from approaching the girl he loves, when he finally got to her, they started singing. This makes it even clearer to me that a concert does need a trick or 2 to add as plus points to entertainment. He worked in the unique music identity of different races into his songs. It was smooth. Cool.

Tao went, “I’m gonna invite one of the girls up on stage”, the next thing I hear from Mich is, “Me me! 就是我liao!” *puke* People around us were giggling lo... The unplugged performance made Tao especially charming.“认真的男人最有魅力”. Indeed. Mich was squeaking “好帅哦！”everytime he whipped out the guitar. … He is the perfect Boyfriend for her, talented, rich, plays the guitar well, great sense of humour and a strong believer of Christ. But sorry, no chance. Haha… Though Mr Tao did say he is seriously thinking of moving to Singapore.

I like the fact that the concert not only revolves around music but also a positive message put across to all. He said, “Love can move mountains.” And the flip side of the world is displayed on screen. Riots, wars, fights, the World not in peace. Such things makes him sad, he said. Awww…. There is a part of the concert that I didn't like though, what's with the Ah Lians dancing on stage suddenly?!!

I realized Tao spoke 80% in English throughout the concert. He seemed to be most at ease while speaking in English, and he must feel really good that he can speak all the Ang Mo he wants without having to worry that there will be no response. I guess Singapore is the only Asia country that gives him the opportunity to do that. Oh! He even did an English dance medley just for us, Singapore! He didn’t dance, but we did. The audience on our side seems to be a little shy and not too responsive sia. But I decided to heck care and stood up! No guts leh Mich…... The other 2 on my right stood up too! They followed suit only when I bravely stood up! Heez… Someone needs to start the ball rolling lah. And of course its me!

I must stress that I was damn relieved when I saw Mich empty-handed when we met up before the concert. Cos she did mention about banners and all. The experience with her on seeing Wu Zheng Yu at Star Awards red carpet about 2 years ago, created some phobia in me. LOL.

Oh! And my tixs are free btw. It’s the most expensive seats…. Jeolous bo?

《Goodbye & Hello》

2008-04-15T23:47:00.001+08:00

因为觉得近年来的华语歌曲无论是旋律或歌词都缺乏了以前所拥有的感动和诚意，要慢又无法令我感动，要快又让人groove不起来，所以脱离了它廷久的一段时间。导致我许久没买什么华语专辑了。。。我一向蛮欣赏蔡健雅的，尤其是在一个节目里听到她唱了一首unplugged 的“Yellow”更为折服。后来听说她的《Goodbye & Hello》广受好评，也看了MTV 《空白格》，决定一试。以免自己再度对一张烂专辑失望（因为现在的CD往往只有2、3 首好听的歌）也对不起自己的口袋，在我一催再催之下终于跟Mich借到了这张专辑。真的没令我失望。三个字，‘很好听’。歌词简单但却能触摸到我心灵的最深处。虽然不是每一首歌都在反应我当下的心情，但我的思索和心灵仿佛能够完全理解与感受每首歌想表达的感觉。我无法不强调每一首歌曲有多好听，这张专辑是越听越上瘾的那一种。尤其是在夜晚，静静地聆听，更为感动。很喜欢其中一段歌词“遗憾别过度分析会上瘾期待别捆绑自己会失望”。不能不对蔡健雅写上个“服”字。若我没记错，她以前是以英语歌曲初始的吧！那时还廷“番薯”的她，如今能一手包办华语专辑，写得如此美丽的歌词与旋律,在台湾的时间总算没白费。Tanya,你真行！听说你已定居台湾。。。Somehow 我可以understand why。

后来我想，若当时蔡健雅没踏出新加坡的话，我们将失去一个听到一把好声音的机会，一位才艺歌手也失去了发光、发挥才能的机会。我们新加坡真的要得到外国的保证才能认定一位好歌手吗？一定要在国外‘品质保证’才是好货吗？为什么就是不肯take a risk and give a chance呢？

P．S．Mich 也顺便硬塞了一张她觉得不错的专辑给我。是位RnB歌手，歌声不错，但专辑嘛。。。一个字‘烂’。里面的歌曲跟其他的千篇一律，我还真分不清专辑里的歌曲有何不同。Oh no… 不是周董，你们自己猜一猜吧。说到周董，因为买了《Goodbye & Hello》顺便买了《我很忙》，我不是周董迷，但不错哦。。。蛮好听的叻。

你在听Tanya的是《It’s True》！这是我现在的心情！慢慢欣赏吧！Cheers!

Because I feel that the standards of Mandarin songs has dropped much compared to the past, it’s been some time since I last bought a Mandarin Album. There’s too many singers with so-so voice, so-so dance with so-so looks. I’m not moved by most of the ballads and the supposing groovy songs don’t make me groove. This explains why I switched to the English Channel and this is also why I sing the same old Mandarin songs that I used to sing during my Poly or High school days during my KTV sessions most of the time. The new songs, well, maybe once in a while one would pick my ears up. Anyway, I have always been quite a fan of Tanya Chua, especially after an unplugged performance of “Yellow” which I saw in one of the Programmes on TV some time ago. I happen to see rave reviews of her latest album “Goodbye & Hello” and also got the chance to catch the MTV of “Blanks”, I decided to give the CD a listen. Of course, to not disappoint myself (becos most only have 2 – 3 good songs in an album most of the time) and my pockets, I nagged at Mich to lend me hers. After 2 long months, I finally got it. It’s a great album! I love every single song in it. The simple lyrics touched the deepest part of my heart. Although not all songs reflect my current emotions, but I can fully understand the feelings each song is trying to express. There’s a part of the lyrics from the album which I especially like. “Overanalyzing regrets is an addiction Tying yourself down with hopes is disappointment”. This is an addictive album. Somehow, I need to listen to it at least once before I head to bed now. I must say, I am very impressed with Tanya Chua. Pardon me if I’m wrong, but I remember she’s quite ‘ang mo’ and she started off with English songs (“My Colour TV” is one that I can remember of). Today, she produces her own Mandarin album with beautiful lyrics and melodies. I’m sure the time in Taiwan helped alot. Hats off to you Tanya!

I was thinking… if Tanya Chua hadn’t stepped out of Singapore, would she have made it here? Why is it so tough to be recognized of our abilities over here? Must we be stamped with the overseas “guaranteed” sign to confirm that we are indeed capable? Why can’t Singapore simply take a risk and give a chance? I somehow understood why she moved to Taiwan…

P.S. Mich die die wanted me to give another album a listen. An RnB singer, but I’m sorry. The album sucks. Everything sound the same, I can’t really differentiate which song is which actually. It sounds just like every other song I heard commonly. No, it’s not Mr Jay Chou. Talking about Jay Chou, I’m no fan of his but I bought his latest album together with Tanya’s. Surprisingly, not bad at all….

You are now listening to Tanya’s “It’s True”. This reflects how I feel now. It’s True. Haha… Enjoy!

The Life Process

2008-04-13T16:35:00.002+08:00

Was having dinner with some friends last Friday. As usual, chats revolved around work and slowly moved on to future plans and partners. A Friend, lets call her A, has been persuaded by her parents to get married. Apparently, her Dad decided to have a talk with her boyfriend and highlighted that “its time”. Her boyfriend at age 24, was stumped. He wasn’t ready as we were told, but seem to accede. Not that he’s unwilling to, but just that he’s not ready. The couple have been together for almost a year. In which to many, it’s a little soon for marriage. At least for me, I very much feel so.

Friend B and Me, “Wow. So soon?!”.

“Well, He’s very nice to me. And I don’t want to give birth only at the age of 35 ok!” (She is now 27)

“But do you really love him?” B and I asked at the same time.

A: “What to do? I can’t have the one I love most.”
She had a long term relationship which was not accepted by the Ex’s family for reasons I feel, are not really valid in this generation.

Sad isn’t it? It makes me wonder what marriage is really based on. Love? Obviously not in the above situation. Is this a life process that we MUST fill in? Thinking back, if I were to fill in the life process which I set maybe 8 to 10 years ago, I would be married this year too. I’ll have 2 children (a boy & a girl) at 30, own a house, a car and holding a managerial post. Haha… But some of it seemed so distant now. To put it bluntly across, Marriage is not even in my mind now, not to talk about having children as well. Poor Mum & Dad…. LOL. Think I’ll leave this glorious task to Jess. So whose fault is this? Society? Cos my mentality and feelings are definitely “re-mould” by the experiences, environment and situations I have gone through and seen. Childhood - > Education - > Career - > Love - > Marriage - > Children - > Grandchildren - > Death. Who set the rule that life should be lived in this formula? Is this the only formula to life or success? Most importantly, Is this the formula to happiness?

I am pretty sure I can never be like Friend A. I can’t marry someone who isn’t the one I love most at that point of time. People always say, “It’s better to be with someone who loves you more.” If love is being measured, is that love? I always believe that the best thing in life, is to wake up next to the person you love most. It’s the first and last thing you would want to see every morning and before you head to bed. It creates this never dying *Spark* in you, and you would look forward to everyday. I guess some will think I’m crazy or naive. But well, it’s exactly what I feel Love should be. Marriage should be based on Love, because that’s one thing that will last and sustain against all odds. Of course its never gonna ba a smooth sailing process and I’m not saying it’s a never dying love or that the love will definitely last forever, but at least at that very moment. You will feel you’re the most fortunate human being in the world. I often tell my friends, “It’s not forever till both of you lie in the coffin still in love with each other.” Come to think of it, precisely because “forever” is so hard to attain, shouldn’t we cherish whatever we have now even more before it slips away?

So where will life lead me? Hmm… I wonder… But I can tell you now, I’m desperately looking for love. *As Always* Haha… *Sparkle* in life! Where are youuuuuuuu???????????

By the way, I realised. Friend A didn’t answer our question. I guess the answer is obvious….

1个月了！

2008-04-11T23:55:00.002+08:00

好快哦！在新的工作岗位已有一个月。时间飞逝，虽然已对这里有些许熟悉但还是有廷深的陌生感。和旧工作环境比起来，我在这得放慢大概一半的脚步吧！很多时候我都在等回复，因为大家虽然在不同的部门，但工作都是紧紧相扣的。而我是负责协调整个计划的负责人所已不能单独行动或作决定，速度就自然地缓慢很多。说真的，很不习惯。从以前到上一份工作，都是在节奏快又速战速决的气氛下进行，突然间要我慢下来还真无法适应。就比如，你一直以来都开2000cc 的车，忽然得开辆1200cc的那样。嗨。。。真不知道这种日子得过多久。。。同事常常告诉我这样的日子快要结束了，叫我好好享受，要不以后就没机会了。或许吧。。。因为现在手头上的新projects还不算正式开始。可是我很讨厌当有人问我关于工作上的问题时我无法回答。怎么说呢？他们问我一些关于正在进行的制作，但因为没有人让我好好地接手指引方向所以我显得一无所知。这个感觉很讨厌，仿佛你没把工作做好。你相信吗？我现在手头上有20个projects但却没有以前在Toy Factory的2个projects忙。因为这里工作形式是每个人都很“专一”。也就是说每个人都是focus在自己的本分就ok了。我想大公司都是这样的吧。。。以前我是Jack of All Trades，做一个project要样样都懂，策划、制作到宣传、样样都得做，若说Master我不敢当，可是我很享受这样的过程。是个很好的学习旅程，也就这样对身边不同的工作伙伴也会有更深一层的了解与谅解，人也自然地变得宽容多了。记得曾经有位老板曾经对我说，“你是属于劳碌命的那种。”现在突然不“劳碌”了，还真的觉得有点奇怪。可是奇怪，不劳碌却大大小小的meetings加起来也去了十多个了吧！

现在每天令我最挣扎的事是如何让我惺忪的眼睛不合起来。我一空闲就会开始“拜神”。Head keeps nodding cos I’m sleepy. 真的怀疑自己得了矢睡症。。。以前在lectures, meetings 时，一觉得无趣或有人在碎碎念就会不自觉睡着。 Its weird I know. My friends are already use to it. Its been years… Since Sec 4 I think.

Anyway, 觉得世界真的很小。自加入新公司以后，就一直在这里碰到不少熟人，既然还和一些朋友有机会再度合作！It’s great! 那天碰到蔡礼莲很开心！不由自主给了彼此一个theatrical hug! 哈哈。。。不知道为什么看到theatre的朋友特别开心。昨天开会时，也发现其中一个节目的导演竟然是我12岁时参加演员训练班的老师！老师不认得我但我记得老师，我告诉他， “因为你当时很凶。”导演一愣。哈哈。。。后来，我加了一句，“放心，我是不会怀恨的！”老师马上说“这句话很严重哦！我需不需要请你吃饭？”（因为现在掌握权在我身上嘛。。。）哈哈。。。真是风水轮流转。我现在还是称他为老师，一日为师终身为师嘛。希望合作愉快。

说了这么多。。。。大家放心！我没气馁。我会努力！在这个地方发出光彩!

Is This A Sign???

2008-03-22T01:44:00.006+08:00

This will be short. But I just somehow have to blog about this cause its so damn strange! Like ESP!

Good Friday Morning, 3.30am, Michie, Nik, Bei Bei and I are having Bak Kut Teh at a coffeeshop in Mohammad Sultan after a high night at Butter Factory. We were a bunch of smelly, tired, hungry and sticky people. Thanks to BeiBei's brillant suggestion of straw drinking. However, I was the least 'sei', believe me. I'm just too good at the finger guessing game!

Anyway, half way through gorging into the bak, I hear someone calling "Jolene!". Heads up, its 'Boyfren' Zach sitting at the table directly opposite me! Then I saw Bachelor 'No. 28', Julius! So delighted to see the 2 cast from Shanghai Blues! We had a short chat then hug our goodbyes. Then Michie, Nik and I flagged for a cab. The moment I hopped into the cab. I hear this violin playing. I knew immediately, it's the theme song of Shanghai Blues 《晚风》. Couldn't believe my ears. Such coincidence! Is this a sign?! What is God trying to tell me about Shanghai Blues?! Did I miss something? LOL. I was shocked but excited! And so.... The next thing I do is sing along. Hahahaha..... Mich who was trying to sleep, nearly died, kept asking me to shut up but I won't. Think Nik was too nice to stop me. So in the end, on the third song playing from Taxi Uncle's oldies CD (I knew every song in that CD!), Mich gave up and sang along with me. 《老情歌》by 吕方。Ahaha... Such an old song....

Uncle knows I luv 《晚风》and he even repeated it for me! So nice of him....
*Sings*

“晚风中，有你我的梦。。。” :)

ME 时代来也！

2008-03-22T01:26:00.007+08:00

我是个喜欢发呆的人，但在我发呆之余，我喜欢observe the people around me. 我想这是我人生中唯一能够一心二用的时候吧。哈哈。。。Under 我的observation, 最近注意到了一个倾向，发现我们都被电子玩意儿电到晕头转向了。在一次乘搭地铁的时候，呆mood来到。我便开始scan 一下四周围。大多乘客，不管是站着或者坐着都在低着头。Why?? 因为他们不是沉醉在Playstation里，就是在拼命SMS,要不就在用高格调的Blackberry回复email,有的就是耳朵塞着耳机低着头摇摇晃晃。不是随着音乐摇摆哦。而是在orh orh! 在睡觉嘛。。。我偶尔也会这样。呵呵…..　

有一次在地铁里我看到一位看似４０多岁的女士站在门口在用Blackberry。也不是很挤，但她站在门口也情有可原。But,　人渐渐变少，她也还是站在原位。后来到了Dohby Ghaut,　很多人要下站了，她还是一动也不动，“稳重如山”，埋头按着Blackberry　的钮。她到底知不知道她这座“山”在挡着人出入叻？？大家都得绕着她走。是真的没发现到，还是just don't care?? 有的小混混更离谱，好像他喜欢听的音乐，everybody 也会like。用他的手机播着大大声的mp3，一直播到他下站为止。真是不知道他们在宣泄什么。是告诉我们你没钱买mp3 player 吗？还是要乘客和你一起摇头，跳舞给你看？不说电子吧。就连报纸也是个问题哦！有人看报纸，翻到很大，仿佛没有人在身旁。地铁很挤的ok! 看到这些情况，真是如福建人所说的觉得 “gek sim” 。omg! 我还真像一位很多怨言的老太婆lei.

曾经看过一个台湾节目，节目提到现代人是活在“ME” 时代，不再是“WE”了。的确如此。就这样，大家都在自己的世界里，不再理会身边究竟在发生什么大小事，因为觉得不再重要了吗？还是因为无关己？“不关我的事。”好像是现在新加坡人的attitude。看了很多例子，不得不承认，现代人真的自私了。不在乎有没有伤害或对别人造成不方便。对父母，对朋友，或对陌生人，很多人都好像为了利益生存着。为了利益才互相扶持。

这样子真的可以吗？What's happening around us,good or bad, is not important anymore? 这是活在这个年代的格式吗？

I’m really not sure.

First Week @ Work

2008-03-17T23:25:00.001+08:00

I’m into my second week at work. Before my 5 senses forget about how it feels to be fresh at my new environment, I reckon I should…. Talk about it? I’m sure after a longer time at this place (being seasoned into some preserved food), I will feel differently than when I first came. So, for memories sake I should blog. Let me re-enact my first day first :)

Drives into carpark, sees security at entrance; “Hi Morning, it’s my first day at work. Do I need to show you my pass or anything? Cos I haven’t got any yet.” Security replies nervously, “I don’t know, it’s my first day at work too.” …. We looked blankly at each other for about 5 seconds…. I just barged in anyway. Apparently, I really need to only barge in.

HR staff brings me to my department. It’s rather bright, it’s definitely big, at least 10 times the size of my previous workplace with about 50 cubicles (12 times of the no. of pax at my old place). It’s quiet, cos it’s early, many has yet to arrive. Enter my dept entrance, Girl A walks past. HR Staff, “Excuse me, do you know where Wan Jun sits?” Girl A, “Huh? I’m sorry, is there a Wan Jun here?”. Another Girl walks past, “I think Wan Jun sits around that area.” Points to far corner on right. And so, HR staff and I walk to the pointed area, HR Staff to Girl C, “Excuse me. Is Wan Jun here?”. Girl C, “Oh! Wan Jun has left the company.” Ah duoi….

I finally settled down at my cubicle after a good 15 mins of searching for the right PIC. My space is really not too bad. It’s spacious with 2 huge desks and has got a few good storage spaces. There’s a PC (with perfect connections, fyi, those who had to tolerate my on/off shit for 1 year +) and there’s a TV (with almost all channels, inclusive of cable), DVD and a Video player. *all smiles* I like…. Haha… Part of my job, as I have been told, is to watch TV (our own programmes most of the time for review and of course others if I want to). I have got a new chair, which doesn’t sink like the old one I had, a new set of stationery all ready, the pantry is filled with beverages (I don’t have to buy bottles of water from CK no more), the stationery room is packed, no more refilling of photocopy papers and toilet paper. There’s really much I can find fault in terms of such. As a matter of fact, I’m so pampered I’m suddenly not used to it. But of course, I wouldn’t repulse this.

My superior brought me around the office for intro, out of the 20 faces I met I can remember 15, but as for the names, only 5. Hahahaha….. There’s just too many of them from different departments, AND! It’s all on the same level. We went on further to meet those in other buildings and levels. *Headache* Oh well, guess I’ll get it in time to come. So far, work has been torturous. Not that I have a lot to do, but because I have not much to do. Everyday everyone seems to be really busy, I can hear many keyboards going “tut. tut. tut. tut. tut.” really fast, which makes me really uneasy, because it seems like my keyboard is the only dumb one. But I guess hearing the ‘tut-ting’ beats hearing the ‘thumping’ (my ex-GM typing angry emails, LOL) of keyboards. After a brief on my job, it sounds really interesting and I look very much forward on what’s to come. So far, my colleagues and superior have been really patient with me. My superior doesn’t want to push me too hard and hopes that I can learn and take over slowly. I appreciate that. I am slowly guided along my path, which is nice. I am trying very hard to pick things up fast so that I can do ‘tutting’ soon too, but it won’t be happening till much later I guess. My superior is away this week for an overseas trip, and thus, makes me even more eng. So for now, every morning the hardest thing I am trying to do, is to keep myself awake. Been struggling not to doze off, really struggling…. I attended about 5 meetings last week with different departments. More meetings to come soon…. I have to really adjust to coordinating with different parts of the corporation instead of the previous 1 man show. And I found out I spend most of the time waiting, I have to wait to get stuff going, precisely because of the fact that I am working with various departments. You wait for each other to move on.

Lastly, it’s the people. The people here are however, very different from Theatre, it’s very…. ‘Corporate’. People can work in the same office but not know each other. They can work on the same project but have never met. They meet in lifts but not greet. There’s this unexplainable distance amongst the people here. Not that they are mean or extremely cold (just a teenie weenie bit), just that… they are too private? Lack of personal touch. In theatre, we chat. And I think the thing we do most when we meet each other is hug or at least a smile and a shake of hands. I’m not saying everyone who hugs is nice but I now realised the importance of human touch. It simply brings people closer and it does make a difference. At the very least, the awkwardness is removed. I think if I were to meet any of the people here on the streets one day and give them a hug, they will freeze and look at me wide-eye as though I’m crazy. Hahaha…. Lunches have been really quiet and short…….. Cos my colleagues are mostly ‘indoor’ gals…… And most of the time they choose to “da bao” and eat in as they watch their individual TVs. Haiz…. I miss lunches with Bryan already. We talk about fun things. Fashion, gossips, personal lives/views, bitch about work, etc! Even lunch with GM is better, cos he’s also like a friend to me.

Whatever it is, I am determined to prove myself here and to make myself proud. It’s too early to judge. At least, I haven’t suffered in the hands of any evil people as yet... LOL.

Oh! Another thing to add, 70% of the staff here are females and I am considered one of the most fashionable (please exclude stars) person in the office. So any hopes to find a “someone” for myself here is close to ZERO I think.

Oh Boy... :(

1 Level Up

2008-03-09T22:26:00.005+08:00

I'm starting my new job tomorrow. Those of you who didn't know, surprised? Well, we all have to climb the ladder at some point of time don't we?

From the time I started working years ago, I know I always wanted to make it big. To never stop climbing the ladder. In a way, I was never satisfied with what I was in and that I should always be moving on to greater heights as I grow older. I personally feel that a career path is like playing a video game. You play the game, your main goal is to complete each level and eventually end up victorious. The last level, always come to a point where you have to fight the biggest villian before you are announced a winner. The biggest villian is like our boss. So far, haha... trust me, I haven' heard anyone said anything fantastic about their bosses. SO lets just play with my little imaginative assumption. It's a matter of wits, perseverance and experience. If you manage to put these 3 together and use them wisely, you complete the game and you take over. You become the boss, who creates your game for others to play.

Of course I'm not saying i want to take over my boss one day. Duh! What I'm saying is that, thats how the cycle work. As you move along, you meet barriers in every level, sometimes its the little soldiers (aka小人)who tries to stop you, cutting your chances on moving forward. Sometimes its the long, tedious work you have to go through. Some people are able to play the same game for years and eventually getting what he wants, but some may become bored and tired of the game that they decide to move on to the next one with what they have learnt from the current one. Keeping their fingers crossed that they play the new game better and moving up the ladder quickly. With the experience and qualifications we have, we sometimes have the secret code, this enables us to jump straight into the higher levels instead of starting from the bottom. There are also others who become numb with the game, either they aren't smart enough to move on to the next level, or they are too lazy to. These are the people who lands in the comfort zone and they just stay at the same level for the longest time. Its like us playing the video game when we simply are unable to move up that we jus completely quit playing or just enjoy the processs of winning at the lower levels.

Wow. Does the above even make sense? Ahaha... Well, its Jolene's little theory :)

It's a new beginning for me tomorrow. I'm a little nervous but really looking forward to it. I am lucky, because this is the place I always wanted to be since the tiny me had my tiny eyes stuck to that box. To be honest,I almost wanted to give it up but wow, the fact is I am here. I will consider myself at Level 3. Hey! Thats not good enough for my age. Haha... I hope I can really shine in this new environment and slowly move on to the tasks awaiting me in the remaning levels.

I think the Americans are right about this one. "Follow your dreams." I did and it worked.

Oh! Btw, meet "mojo", the bonus I got for completing level 2. Awww.... He's blushing.

Leap Year 2008

2008-03-02T22:52:00.010+08:00

All Smiles!
Odd 1 Out
TABOO

It's Feb 29 on Friday. I don't even remember what I did for the previous leap years. hahahaha.... Didn't think it was any special, but I guess this year is different. We did a 2nd Shanghai Blues gathering at Sentosa on Friday, attendance wasn't great as usual (LOL), but still, we had fun. Julius..... Tsk tsk... Organizer but chose his bed over us.

The journey to Sentosa was actually more dramatic than when we were actually there. Firstly, I have no idea how to get there. All I got from Meiling Jie is that u drive out of Outram park exit then go to Cantonment Police Station then at some point i have to turn left. And so I took the risk of not looking at the map and went to pick up Xiao Gui Jasmine. I think that gal nearly died in her passenger seat, she calls me a reckless driver. hahaha.... which i really dun deny. Cos I was cursing whoever is driving too slow or who in my opinion is reckless. I did this sudden swerve on the left nearby harbourfront and she went "wurrrrr......!". LOL.I just can't stop laughing. But yah lah she went toufu. There was no car behind what... If I dun make that swerve we would be going the wrong way.

And then, we met Meiling Jie, Xiao Gui Del and Poh Chuan. As Mr Poh Chuan claims to be a frequent of Sentosa Beaches, we decided that he takes Meiling's car and lead the way, but.... this boy took us to the carpark so darn faraway from our Tanjong Beach! and we had so many thigns to carry! Really is xin cuo ren le. We should have known, its Poh Chuan! for God's sake. :p And so I went for a merry go round at Sentosa, analysing the map wif 2 kiddos, Xiao Gui J to direct and me to drive and Xiao Gui D doing nothing behind but jus insult as usual. As i was driving, Xiao Gui J goes "turn right here!", which I already past the turn and which i Jam brake and which leads to a van nearly running into my precious Mojo behind in which in turn i jammed up the road by stopping at the side trying to make a reverse. Point is , we got there eventually lah! But si bei drama. So chaotic in the small car. Poor Mojo.

Meiling Jie who loves spoiling us, cooked a feast. There was pizza, the fantastic Spaghetti and sandwiches! We went on to play beach ball, I really suck at it, took me 10 mins to really get into the game. Kelly who claimed she doesn't know how to play, was obviously lying. And she later confessed that she was from the volley ball school team. Kao..... Julian was really sweet, he made the effort to come even though he had to leave in a while. Awww... We moved on to Taboo, which was oso rather drama, hahaha..... Have you ever seen people playing taboo under the hot sun, all standing up, surrounding each other and all tense? We split into 2 teams, the "sheltered" team and the "tanners". Cos there are people like Meiling jie, Julian, Kelly (who had like 4 inches of sun block), and Missy Mindee (covered up like a mummy) who cannot hurt their fair skins. Anyway, in the end we still rojak and mixed the teams up. Lemme analyse the different behaviours of the individuals in the game, TABOO.

Esther - Shes the Drama Queen. Shes hilarious!!! With her 5 fingers put together like bolly bolly talking to you. "say something! a few words! Keep quiet! Let him speak! Speak!" OMG. Without her, it wouldn't be that fun.

Poh Chuan - When it's his turn to describe to his teamates. It's ......*silence*, as time ticks by, still.... *silence* When he does say something "I dunno how to say." "There is alot of this in the forest!" *BEEP* The word is 'Rainforest'. 'Forest' taboo word leh boy! But I have to admit, he's good at guessing. oh! And he's got a hotbod (that's what Julian said)! Gals (if u r straight) & Boys (if u r gay) will drool. *slurp*

Shaun & Cherie the darn chio couple - Shaun is a betrayer, he will just unknowingly recognise himself as from Cherie's group when he's not! Keeps giving them darn good clues unconciously ! Cherie is darn good at guessing! A few words that no one can really unerstand from Shaun and she actually knows them! duh.... Everyone said this at least once to me. "Cherie is chio." I know lah! Haha...

Mindee - She's like this strict referee standing next to you, "no. You can't say this word. No. You can't do that. No. No Chinese." Wah liew, stand next to her definitely stress. HAha... but shes good at this game and shes calm as ever. so calm its scary. Competitive opponent, but great team mate too, cos no temper. :p

Meiling Jie - A kind soul, being the time keeper she helps whoever is struggling. She's like our mother hen. Haha... While Mindee and I were screaming its unfair cos she helped the other team more she completely ignored us and continued to help. She did help us too when Xiao Gui J was struggling lah.

Kelly - Very alert. When the opponent said the taboo word, the card is removed by her even b4 you know it! Her favourite line when shes playing, "something like that".

Xiao Gui D - Alot of words she doesn't recognise. Tsk. Read more pls. But when she does know the word she can describe it really well. You'll get it in a while.

Xiao Gui J - Injects alot of illusions that we know her very well. "Wo shu shen me?!" (which year am I born in?!) ???? Seriously, wo men bu zhi dao. Things only Xiao Gui D will noe....... who! can't say anything cos shes in the other team. LOL.

Zach - HE came late, he nearly didn't wanna come, but he did eventually. Choosy fella, he claimed he dun want a himbo (PC) and a few bimbos in his team. But.. he's ok only at this game himself lo..... LOL.

ME - The *Beeper*. I just luv using that rubber thing that quacks at people when time is up. I use rojak language. I use anything to get the word right! Eng, Chi, Malay! Anything lah!

What a leap year. 亲爱的朋友们，四年后，我们会拿着馒头在桥下见吗？

*HUGS*

Bunny Needs Home

2008-02-25T23:31:00.003+08:00

Hello People!

Helping my fren Yvette finding this extremely cute Bunny a home. It's a Netherland Dwarf! She bought it in total for about 500 bucks which includes the vitamins, 3 kinds of food, 2 kind of hay (meaning 5 kind of food) and then the shower powder, the food tray, the rabbit comb, the disinfectant, the water bottle and a HUGE ass cage (quoted from Yvette) which won't need to change for the rest of its life. It's alot of stuff added into this exclusive package. Quite a deal for just 350.

Call me and I'll help seal the deal.

Yvette's doggy is disturbing little bunny too much. So before it gets eaten up, Bunny needs new home. How can you say no. Awwwww.....

《上海之夜》完结篇

2008-02-12T10:50:00.000+08:00

很快的，《上海之夜》在上个星期六正式演出完毕。感触良多。我这个人有个大缺点，那就是对于我喜欢的东西我常常有着很深的不舍之情，要一段很长的时间才能放手。我很喜欢《上海之夜》，这八个月来的努力就在两天的呈现中告一段落。有时觉得挺可笑，但也知道要完成这样的一个Project真的需要很大的努力，毅力及勇气。忙忙碌碌了八个月，现在突然停了下来，energy跌倒了谷底，完全无法再融入下一个Project里。觉得有点恍惚，空虚，反而觉得更累，心情到现在还是无法平复下来。很舍不得所有工作人员，演员们，设计师等。尽管告诉自己不能哭，我还是在Cast Party的最后大哭了一场。真是丢脸丢到尽，还好所剩的人无几。

从寻找、凭请演员、设计师、工作人员到配合导演的要求、彩排及演出的安排一直到宣传，说不累是假的，但的确忙得非常开心。觉得日子过的特别充足。虽然我无法做到可以please每一个人，但老套地说一句，我问心无愧，能够做的我都已经做了。我也觉得我特别幸运，在整个过程中遇到了很多贵人，毫不计较地帮了我不少，我也在很多人身上学了不少东西。我在整个过程当中耐心被推倒了极点，我现在真的觉得没什么事是做不到的。

《上海之夜》的票房和我预期的一样好，但评语却没我想象中那样完美。可以说是mixed reviews 吧！有好有坏。有人觉得舞台不够豪华，有的觉得很美（我当然是觉得很美啦！那个backdrop是我的favourite）。有些觉得音乐有新鲜感，有的觉得不够影响力（我爱Philip写的那些新歌，都已经背熟了，时不时就会哼一下）。Choreography不用说，我觉得Jeffrey真的没话说，很committed（我的最爱是那一场文冲打完仗回来，群众演员在桥的另一端做出手争扎的一幕，实在太美了）。

苏永康很好相处，歌声很有磁性，Emma无法质疑是实力派老将，Mindee很可惜。。。虽然演技顶级但却败给了歌声。这些歌曲真的不容易唱，我想上上下下的工作人员都知道她有多用功，付出了很多（这是观众看不到的）。但有时有些事我想不是我们能控制的，不是付出多少就得到多少。也只好看开点，乐观点吧。Celine一鸣惊人，Darius是笑点之一，Daniel 在短短的时间内说了一口算是挺标准的华语，Judy一直苦恼着如何把一场笑声做到最好。群众演员很爱闹，但我也很庆幸有他们参与这个演出。认识了一群可爱的小鬼们，和他们一起闹，觉得自己年轻了不少。哈哈。。。

虽然大家都有怨言，至少都有把本分做好吧！难怪人们常说台上三分钟，台下十年工。这是身为观众永远无法体会到的。我是个幸运儿。我还真是啰哩八说个没完lei.
好了！就这样！

在此，由衷地感谢所有演员及工作人员！

《上海之夜》我爱你！

It's Coming! It's Coming!

2008-02-05T00:16:00.000+08:00

I can't believe it! 8 months has whizzed pass me and Shanghai Blues is staging in a few days! I am so f*cking exicted! It's so exciting that I can really think of the F word to descibe this! Haha.. In a good way of course!

My baby has grown into something so big! Even though I have watched it like 5 times of the rehearsals (with costumes, without costumes, only half of them have costumes, etc), I am never sick of it! I still laugh at the same scenes, teared at some scenes when I'm moved. I'll definitely cry like a baby when it performs in Esplanade this coming weekend. I think I told the whole world about this. HAhaha...

So much shit in this production! Last minute requests, coordination, my cast, my crew, the space, the band, the cock ups. There are many times when people expect magic from me and I feel like saying F u (in a bad way), but it's all good now. I have grown loads from this experience. It's hard to say goodbye. And even though its not staged yet, I know deep down in my heart its all worth it!

Besides the shit, I think we still had fun. Some pics below on spooky people. Some are in their stage make up, so yea. Of course they dun usually look like that! Duh!

Ollie & Moi

My very Capable SM (Stage Manager lah!) Cecil

Ma Yi (the ant), Moi & Mindee???

Darius Dear & Moi

My very street smart Wardrobe Mistress, Yvette.

I Like it

2008-02-04T23:38:00.000+08:00

Wow! It's been really super duper long since I last blogged. I'm gonna do 2 blogs in a row! I'm really tied down by loads of work these days. Anyway, I'll blog on that in a while.

It was Granny's Bday last week. And most of the 3 generations were there. I always enjoy the company of big families, though I'm not into having a family myself. Haha.. I love to hear the laughter, I luv the warmth and I luv the noise. It just makes me feel great. I can't explain it. It's a family feel. Ah Ma seems really happy even though the food sucks. LOL. I guess thats wat really matters. It's a pity it's only twice a year. We short little kids are now all working grown ups. Think of the silly things we did in the past, its stupidly funny.

Here are a few examples:

1) A fat cousin of mine spat his chewing gum into my mouth.
2) My partner in crime drank XO with me. We were 10 and 11?
3) We threw yakult bottle into toilet bowl to destroy evidence that we drank 2 extra bottles.
4) My sis sat on my head with her naked ass when we were jumping up & down on the bed.
5) I have 1 cousin who loves banging his head against the wall.
6) I have one cousin who use to behave like a gal.
7) I have 1 cousin who spout vulgarities when she was just 4!
8) I gave a cousin a superb karate kick in the tummy while we were wrestling.
9) My cousin cried when he played sword fighting with me.

many many more! It's just too many to list down. But wow, it is sad to know that we hardly meet now and sometimes we dun even noe wat to tok about. But hey! After we slowly warm up, everyone is high again. Especially the photo taking session. It was chaotic!!!!

But I like..... :p

We took dozens of fotos but I shall just let you take a peek on Genration 1 , 2 & MY family.

Cheers!

Change

2007-12-05T18:14:00.000+08:00

I suddenly thought about the time when I was a kid. I was a really quiet girl. It’s hard for those who know me now to imagine how autistic I was. In Primary 1, I remember always having lunch alone with no friends at all every recess with my Dearest Grandad. Who! Is one of the sweetest people to me. He would wait for me every recess and make sure that a hot bowl of noodles is waiting for me. This lasted for about a year. Then I befriend a girl called Wen Qing, who went on to be my best friend during the same year. We would always chat on the phone with childish conversations, telling each other ridiculously imaginative jokes. My Grandma couldn’t stand it, she would practically nag till I hung up. Wen Qing has this really smart cousin who was in the same class as us and I started hanging out with her gang. This bunch of smart kids…. I would just stick behind them hoping to make some new friends and getting some recognition. I felt a little extra, a little like a tiny servant. I really couldn’t connect with them. And I think they don’t see me as part of them too.

Primary 4 came, where there’s streaming and the smart ones were “deported”. I was in the last class since Primary 2. Weird, I didn’t do exactly bad, so were my classmates. I wonder how they segregate us. Anyway, at Primary 4 this boy was seated next to me. And I think God somehow took pity on me for my 3 antagonizing years, cos this boy next to me is extremely talkative. He’s a 100% chatterbox, and this chatterbox (Name: Guo Hui) opened the sealed box (me) next to him. Since then, for the whole year, I have no idea how many times have we both been punished for talking in class. But he somehow saved me, I opened up and made lots of new friends, mingled alot and eventually had my own gang of 7 which we lasted till Sec 1. It was kinda cool. Cos though there are only 5 left now, we still meet up whenever we can and still… the chattering doesn’t stop. I just attended 1 of the girl’s wedding last Sunday. She is the one with the most kiddish look amongst us and she got on the boat first. Weird is life.

We are grown ups now, topics are different, lives are lived differently, even our height ranks are different now (I use to be one of the shortest, use to be means not anymore), but it’s a wonderful thing that we can still hang out. It’s a good feeling.

So what’s my point of writing this? I’m not sure myself. Haha… I guess what I’m trying to say is that life is amazingly unpredictable. You may be stuck in the mud now but somehow someone or something may just give you hand. You may be high up on the top of the mountain at the moment but someone or something may just give you a hard push at the back.

We can never be in the same situation forever; it’s just a matter of time. Lets all embrace change. :)

Cheers.

Growing Old Is Inevitable, Growing Up Is Optional

2007-11-26T18:12:00.000+08:00

Another year has passed un-noticingly. All I can say is “Wow.”

It really sucks to know that I’m 27 next year. The bell in my head keeps going “Dang! You’re old. Dang! You’re old.” I don’t even act like a 25, not to talk about joining the 27s’ club. I still laugh like a dork and weep like a new widow as I indulge myself in TV all day long, I’m mesmerized by fairytale-like movies such as “Enchanted” (I hummed the song till I fell asleep after the movie), I still look forward to the thrill rides in Universal Studio, I will still want a PSP for my birthday, I’m like an energizer battery when it comes to fun. BUT, I have to be a mature thinking adult aside all that because it is an inevitable fact that I am someone reaching 30.

So… what makes me an adult that meets the requirements of a 27?

Well, let’s see… I do have a stable job with a nice name such as “Executive” but my salary certainly doesn’t meet the mark. I have a stable income with some savings but I can afford no credit card. I contribute to the Family allowance but it’s just enough for my Mum to spend it on 4D (Haha… It’s her long term hobby). I have life experiences but no personal love experience. I give friends adequate advices but I spout nonsensical jokes too. I solve problems with a cool head but fumble at times with new ones. I mingle well with people but I can’t connect well with the top management level.

So… On the surface I do meet the requirements. Hmmm… If growing up is indeed optional, I would really rather not. But face it, we do. Growing up isn’t all bad I guess. In this society, growing up is a way to protect ourselves. With life experiences (painful or not), we are able to avoid from being hurt or deceived. We become wiser after each. If we ain’t wiser, I wouldn’t say we are stupid to not understand or know the consequences of certain decisions. We are just stubborn. Stubborn till we are roughened up, knowing that we can no longer stick to what we thought was the way, we switch paths. Simple as that. And so we toughen up and continue to brave through life. That is really the way of life isn’t it? Otherwise, end it, which I wouldn’t call that life anymore cos it wasn’t cherished.

Conclusion: I’ll just be playing with Barbie when I want to (hmm… I never do play with Barbie, I go for He-Man) and be Lois Lane when I have to. Hey… Growing up is indeed optional!

Shanghai Blues the Musical

2007-10-29T23:15:00.000+08:00

Finally!! It's here! I have worked my ass off for this project people! Support Me!!! Ticket opens 1 Nov 07.

Enjoy the MV.

For clearer view,
you can go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZIg2vCNxVI
Performance on 8 & 9 Feb 2008 at Esplanade Theatre. Show ur fren (Me!!!!) ur utmost support. I promise a fantastic show.

I can organize and we can all watch together. A form of gathering? I look forward to that. Should be fun. Call me if ya interested. Dun make me make you. You get what mean... Hohoho!

What Do You See?

2007-10-21T23:03:00.000+08:00

My Dad sms me today, "Why don't you change job?". I wasn't exactly shocked but I was kinda taken by surprise. Cos it really came out of the blue, we were discussing about our Man U victory before that. I know he's worried about my future. Honestly, I am too. After we hung up, I told Brother about me worrying that I dunno where to go or what I can do if I leave this current one (this has been my worrying prob which I have already discussed with a few frens). He just casually said "Have...IR lah." This answer really gave me a hard knock on the head.

How can I forget?!! This is in fact the very reason why I took up this current job. Its an indescribable feeling. I was so engrossed in the downside of things, the problems in front of me that I forgot my initial goal which was actually beyond all this. I had forsaken the vision I had for these short term elements in my face. How can I forget... I still can't figure it out. But I really have to thank Bro for this unintentional reminder. My goal may change along the way, the circumstances may one day not even allow me to achieve my goal. But at least, at this very moment it is what I want and I am going to work towards it, one way or another.

Given the above situation, I somehow see the same rational with relationships. It works the same way. As you are in a relationship, problems start to occur, temptations are all around and you tend to forget why you fell in love at the first place. All because you are too focus on what's in front of you. You spent all your time and energy to solve or enjoy the NOW, that you leave behind the past which was at first suppose to be your future. So many failed relationships I heard, and its the kind that are like close to marriage?? When you think of marriage and make plans on it, technically... doesn't it mean that you want to spend the rest of your lives together? So how come just by an email, a sms and it's over. They don't even want to see you and say a proper goodbye. It scares the hell outta me. It just simply potrays a picture of how fragile a relationship is. The word "love" is really too easy, too convenient and too cheap in this era.

What's love man. There's no definition to it already, it's like water, it fills in watever situation you want it to be in. No definite shape. I'm not saying everything leads to a "forever", but its really so easily disposable.

Now whenever I hear which ever fren is in a realationship, I'll be really happy for him/her. At the same time, I'll somehow kip my fingers crossed and hope for a happy ending. But even that, not even a teeny weeny of shock if I ever hear bad news about it. It''ll be like, its just another failed relationship.... So what?

Blabber 2

2007-10-20T00:27:00.000+08:00

After my blabbering post below, I decided to lie on my bed and think about the good things of my job.

1) I can wear casual. Jeans and Tees. My fav. Alot of jeolous people out there.
2) It's convenient. Chinatown! 1 direct train ride of only 25mins! More jeolous people!
3) Cheap & Good Food! Wah lan! Its everywhere!
4) Not much politics. I mean... Well.... Only 4 people in the office, that includes the GM and the
directors are often not in. Si mi politics to talk about?
5) The satisfaction after the completion of an assignment. Photoshoot, Press Con, Stage
Performance! Though efforts and time spent may sometimes not be paid off. But whee.... The
relief and the "I've done it!" kinda feeling. Sensational.
6) The wide circle of people I meet. Celebrities, the powerful, the rich, the poor, the bastards,
the bitches and many many more. You can't get that at just any job.
7) Celebrities gossips. It's funny how things that are none of my fucking business can actually perk work up a little. Lots of juicy juicy news indeed.
8) Invitation to parties, events, movies, etc... Free goodies, Free Food, Free alcohol... I'll slap whoever that says they wouldn't want that.

Sometimes I feel it's really amazing how a small company like us can pull off great, big shows. We are small in size, but big in the industry. We are definitely moving on to bigger things, bigger than what we have done, bigger than anyone would have ever imagined. I should really be patient. Wait and See...

Once again, I'm doing it. Self-Psycho: "I love my job. I love my job! I Loooooooove my Job!!!"
There! I'm back in love.
*Fingers Crossed* Please help me get through 24th Oct smoothly. Please Please Please?

Blabber

2007-10-10T23:55:00.000+08:00

A new post but 2 months have actually pass. I can't exactly recall what I have been doing during this period. I often wonder to myself. What am I working for? Easy to say, it's money. But sad to say it's purely for money as well. Why doesn't interest last? I mean I was at first rather excited with my job and the people I meet and all that. But after some time, I start to wonder, am I suitable for this job? Can I eventually find a job that really satisfies me? Am I not good enough? We are constantly living in expectations. Your parents expect you to succeed in life. Your Boss expects results. Your partner expects more love. And you, expect more time for yourself.

Is it just me? Or are there many others alike out there? Meeting up with friends and chatting about life, helped me realise... There are indeed many unhappy people in this country. But why?

We have a secured environment, we live in prosperity, we have comfortable homes.... so... what exactly is missing? I can't put my finger to it. I just can't. So am I happy? At times... yea.. Especially weekends I'm sure. Am I unhappy? Not all the time... So am I just not satisfied with life or Am I unhappy? Can these 2 be seperated? Cos theres the saying thats goes, if you are satisfied with what you have then you'll be happy. So what exactly satisfies us?

I wonder.... I really wonder... forgive my million questions and blabbering. I think I'm in stone mode. I need to find my rhythm which I think I somehow lost it long ago....

I have learnt not to expect anything from anybody. For Expectations come dissappointments, Non-expectancy comes surprises.

In the end, I just want a simple life.... Thats too much to expect from this tiny country.

I have something serious to tell you.

2007-08-28T15:07:00.000+08:00

While Bryan and I are engrossed with work in the office, the company’s accountant E suddenly stood up and walk to our desks. (Note: The following conversation is in stuttered, unclear Mandarin)

E: “I have something serious to tell you all, but just dun be too startled lah.”

In the mean time……

Running thru My mind: “Shit! Boss on holidays so no salary?! We cannot claim petty cash?!” Yup, for me, its all about the money.

Running thru Bryan’s mind: “WTH is this freak gonna say this time?”

Back to the Scene

E: “I have this male friend who is pestering me and I want to say that I’m not gay. He really scare me leh, now I dare not go out wif guys.”

Immediate Reaction…

Jo: “Wah! U have something serious to tell us and it’s this?”

Bryan: Silence….. In shock.

Jo: “How you know your friend’s gay?”

E: “He suddenly became very possessive, asking where I am and asking me why I’m avoiding him. My friends say he must be gay.”

At this point, I really wanna puke. Not because of the GAY thing but because it’s from him. And when he says his ‘friends’, I’m thinking of a bunch of geeks sitting around a table.

Bryan: Silence… STILL in shock.

I just wanna say that we are both in shock cos we never tot anyone would fall for him and not to say men.

Jo: “Chey… I tot u wanna tok about work or what. You are gay or not its your personal life we not interested to know. What’s the point of telling us?”

Bryan: “Please… Don’t worry, we wun fall for you lor.”

E: “No lah, I just wanna let you all know that I’m not gay. (laughs) Cos I now very
scared of going out wif guys.”

Jo and Bryan: Rolls eyes, turns back to com. *pukes*

MSN Bitching between Jo and Bryan starts.

Jo: "Wah lan….. Mus be Karma due to all the gay jokes we are poking fun at him with. Especially you."

Bryan: "I shall refrain from toking to him at all."

The END.

Empty.

2007-08-15T12:02:00.000+08:00

I’m really blogging much lesser these days. One reason of course, I’m lazy. Secondly, I think I’m having mind blocks. As in no idea what to write about. Think my everyday life, besides work, ain’t that exciting after all. All too subtle…. I am indeed ‘fan jian’ ( I don’t know what you call that in English). I am indeed Human. I guess we are all looking for some form of indulgence in most part of our lives. And most of the time, we indulge in the wrong things and to worsen it, we somehow subconsciously enjoy the pain. Hmm… weird. But so human. And so, now, having nothing to indulge in…. Life is DULL…… Which! Makes me kind of lost in thoughts and drives me a little crazy. Third reason, my computer is moving like a god damn Pentium 1, and having my patience running real short these days, I simply give up on it. The last reason, I’m into this US drama serial. Now with its 5^th season starting, I practically have to begin the marathon from Season 1, that’s a lot to catch up with since it started all the way back from millennium. But when it comes to TV, trust me, I’ll be there in no time. Just so I was looking for a soundtrack of a movie but my eyes caught the CD with a really stylish cover. So I decided to check it out and I’m hooked. The emotions in this slick drama are so intense that you may find it a little psychotic but at the same time it felt so real. The complicated human mind and desires are reflected cruelly and bluntly across. I’m recently into really emotional stuff. Maybe it’s because of my arty fartsy working environment; we are trained to look at things in a deeper and different perspective. Or maybe, it’s my kind of indulgence for now since I have nothing else.

Nope, I’m not gonna tell you the title of this serial, cos if I do, imaginations run wild. LOL. Or is it running wild already?

The Salute

2007-07-03T00:51:00.000+08:00

I dunno why I'm only inspired to write when something bad happens. Jus came back from a funeral. Uncle Kwok, my ex-neighbour and close fren of the family who kinda watch me grow up passed away suddenly. I couldn't believe it when my dad called me and told me to look at the orbituary to make sure. I wouldn't believe it until I saw the photo. A pilot, a healthy man jus left like that. I always remember his signature greetings whenever he sees us, "hello hello!" and his hearty laughter where you can hear it practically ten yards away. Always a cheerful man. A great man who loves his family and generous to his frens, whom I simply can't think anything bad of. A man worthy of my utmost respect and worthy of my tears and grieve. Aunt Lilian (the wife) seemed strong from afar but when mum and I got close to her, she whispered my name, "Jolene..." and all 3 of us jus hugged and broke down in tears. In the end, Aunt Lilian had to console me instead of me doing the other way round. "Don't cry anymore, Uncle Kwok doesn't like it." I'm such a weakling......

So many bad things have been happening ard me since the year started, and I wonder when are all these shit ever gonna stop. I don't need constant reminders that people are leaving (even Bret) me, hurting me or even making use of me. Its sick and I couldn't take it. Whenever I picked myself up things starts coming back to me or new BAD things happens. In return, injecting new BAD thoughts and old hurtful memories. Putting me down again and again.

Life is really too short. Its fragile. Big giants like us can be killed by a tiny mosquito, thats how fragile we are.

For now, who can be in more grieve than Aunt Lilian and her daughter? Who am I to complain about life being cruel or unfair to me? I need to look at life in a bigger picture really, take a step back. Sometimes I just choose to see only that little spot and magnify the whole thing blinding myself. I look back at times and of course thinking to myself with buckets of regrets, "What the hell was that for?!". Which, is what I'm doing now as well and I'm sure you guys do sometimes.

I'm gonna just enjoy life now. Learn to appreciate the little pleasures and the worthy people. Not clinging on to what I lost or not have, but to what is in my hands. To smile when there are happy memories and to brush them away if it hurts. Like memories of my little Bret.

As a friend, I urge not only myself but you as well.
It's time to wake up. You dunno what you have and you dunno what you had.
Life is too short to live in pain.

Hello Hello! Uncle Kwok, the Seah Family hereby salutes you.
"A man of great heights and humility, who once graced our lives with his generous heart and resonant laughters. Always Always Remembered."

Lil Star by Kelis

2007-04-26T16:01:00.000+08:00

there is nothing special about me
i am just a lil star
if it seems like i'm shining brightly
it's probably a reflection of something you already are
i forget about myself sometime
when there's so many other around
when deep inside you feels darkest
that is where i can always be found
that is where i can always be found
that is where i can always be found

just keep trying and trying
it's just a matter of timing
though the grinding is tiring
don't let 'em stop you from smiling
just keep trying and trying
sooner or later you'll find it
it's surprising how inspiring
it is to see you shining
cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me

there is nothing special about me
i am just a lil star
if you try to reach out an touch me
you'll see i'm not really that far
i may not be the brightest nor am i the last one you’ll see
but as long as you notice, that’s just fine with me
everything’s just fine with me
everything’s just fine with me

just keep trying and trying
it's just a matter of timing
though the grinding is tiring
don't let 'em stop you from smiling
just keep trying and trying
sooner or later you'll find it
it's surprising how inspiring
it is to see you shining
cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me

there is nothing special about me
i am just a lil star
i’ve been running and jumping, but barely
getting, getting over the bar
i plan on being much more than i, am but that's in do time
but until then i'm guilty, and being humans my crime
being human that is my crime
being human that is my crime

just keep trying and trying
it's just a matter of timing
though the grinding is tiring
don't let 'em stop you from smiling
just keep trying and trying
sooner of later you'll find it
it's surprising how inspiring
it is to see you shining
cause in the dark of the night you're all i can see
and you sure look like a star to me

10 Times Busier, 100 Times Tougher But Feeling 1000 Times Better

2007-04-16T22:45:00.000+08:00

I hereby declare I LOVE my job.
No, not because of the free booze at the 251 post party last night where I blabbered so much rubbish which made my colleague said this before i left work today, "I have to adjust to your new postural". What does he even mean by that? I said the same thing back cos he also blabbered many Hmm.... Ok, anyway, I love my job Just simply because it makes me feel good. Though at the start of the week (Today) I already listed down like 20 things with deadlines I have to meet. Damn.

Of course there are shitty times at work, but well, if there ain't no shit, it ain't no work. Overall, I just think of the good times more than the bad. Though I just successfully finished the trailer shoot, cast meeting and workshop over the weekend (which are only small parts of the project), the tiny sense of achievement is enough to keep me going. I was the assistant producer who coordinated the whole shoot, the coolie who helped moved props, the relief Director when the actual one has to leave for something urgent and the FOH staff who gives out free goodies of condoms and feminine wash to audience. And When I'm back in the office, I'm a Programs Executive fighting for sponsors. Wow. Its quite an experience for 2 half months aint it?

Especially after both post parties of 251 and TITOUDAO, it just tells me how good one will feel whenever a project is over. The satisfaction, it just overcomes and the rest are forgotten. Everything's just sweet after the bitter, and the bond I see in this big family is just fantastic. Nobody is left out and all are sincerely appreciated, though.... they may not be rewarded. I don't think you can get much of this anywhere else. Not at my last workplace at least. People are not even treated equally, we were purely just slaves of those who ARE also our slaves.

Though I suffer from ultimate stress, I kip fighting to meet deadlines and I miss them too, I had sleepless nights over work, my low confidence bugs me at times, I have to work loads of OT once in a while and I'm not being paid for that, even my weekends may be gone, the pay is rather minimal but still, I hope I'll be confirmed by the end of the month. Its my last trial month, I'm actually worried I wun get this! Can you believe it???!!! Ewwww..... I'm really a working adult already.

I still do my best to enjoy myself as much as I can though. Talking nonsensical stuff and do silly things with RobRob & Siong Siong , play the pool/tennis, catcha movie, curse at soccer matches, club only every 3 months now (excludes social party please, ak hem... its work.), blah blah blah. I appreciate RobRob & Siong Siong whom I spend almost every weekend with. I guess most probably cos we are all single and enjoythe company of idiots (as I always say... I'm a kid at heart). Cos you know, once people are attached they tend to neglect and forget about their friends. You know.... People like ..... Taitai.... haha! I bet she'll be tagging to claim her innocence later.

I am a Proud Kidult!

Fame or Shame

2007-03-27T19:49:00.000+08:00

Uh-huh. Yes. We are doing a play on Annabel Chong's life. Of cos the first thing that hits you is SEX. I mean, yeah. What else can u think about when this familiar name rings the bell. The most common response that I got when I informed anyone about this latest project, "What?! You mean you guys are gonna replay her having real sex with 251 men on stage???". Duh..... Wah lau! You think the Government will allow that mehz? Kaoz.... And theres like 14 shows, if Cynthia Lee really does that, hmmm.......lemme see...
251 men x 14 shows = 3514 times of sex. IF she really does that, no one would remember Annabel Chong, but Cynthia Lee instead for the many years to come. She'll be the one in the Guiness book of records.

There were many many negative and angry critics when we dare Singapore that we're gonna do this. "They are just riding on her to make money." "What if Annabel Chong is your daughter?? Will you do this to her??!" "Why bring back something so shameful on Singaporeans?" blah blah blah.
All I want to say is Bleh! Bleh! Bleh! So what if we are doing this?! I mean, honestly, No matter how we wanna pretend that it didn't happen, it did. So why don't we all just drop all the hypocrisy of nope, we are not interested in sex and try to learn something from here heh. Something worth exploiting rather than just condemning.

I had the first glimpse of the run last week. I must admit its daring, its hot but its much more than these. Theres much anger and imbalance, many doubts that we are curious but not having the balls to question. Its Life. Especially this generation, whereby we have more problems mentally and physically than anything else. Story of a girl from a disciplined family suppressing herself, when she chose to let go she was cruelly rejected by an appearance humans chose to false but yearns to be. She continued being the nice little girl while pursuing her studies in England but was once against unleashed by something unexpectedly unfortunate. And she snapped. Away from where she had always wanted to leave. And to how she wanted to live with a new identity. In the end, shes back to where she once thought was not what she wanted. Back in the box but in a different environment. She fights hard now to abandon the once adopted identity.

We often start pointing fingers before seeing the reason behind whatever happened. Or should I say, we choose not to know. Cos its always easier to blame I guess. We were taught that its safer to stay in the formula than to step out of it.

And now.... I present to you.
251 - Inspired by the story of Annabel Chong.

If you're 18 & above, plus curiosity is tapping on your shoulders. Watch it!
If you think its disgusting. Beat it. Don't waste either of our time.

Life doesn't only revolve around Sex. And so is this play.

Circus Circus

2007-02-22T00:28:00.000+08:00

After almost 2 months of being a "zou bo", I finally ended with a job just 2 weeks before CNY. I must say i'm god-damn lucky. Cos I got to 'Siam' the "arrows" which I definitely will get WHEN I meet my relatives IF I'm still jobless. At least for now, when they ask, "What you doing now?". I can say, "I'm working in a theatre productions company", blah blah blah.... The most common answer I got was ,"oh.... Sounds very interesting..". I'll follow with the flash of my set of teeth. The biggest grin. I don't even mind announcing that though a Programs Executive, I'm actually doing "sai gan". Well, I got a job. Thats the whole point.

I have always knew that the entertainment circle is very complicated. I spent almost my whole life reading gossip columns, how can I not know right? [Really think I can make a really great entertainment news show host] Anyway, though where I work ain't exactly THE entertainment industry, the job scope and tons of work with different genre. The people revolving is close enough. I'm somewhat confused by them once in a while. Was having lunch with a colleague of mine, and she suddenly announce that shes not straight. I'm like ok..... Smile, listen, Smile. I mean thats all I can do ain't it? Your second day of work, people oready tell you her whole lesbby story. I have no qualms about the 'crooked' issues at all. How can I be? Its year 2000+ liao leh. Then she revealed theres a couple of the same sex in my office. Ok.... Smile wears off a little. [which now I find it rather amusing... The way these 2 call out to each other, its kinda cute actually.] Then she starts revealing more, who is straight, who's not, who is doing what, Who is with who. Wah lau, Butches are still women lor. They jus like to bitch. Anyway, It ended up with me saying, "why don't you just list down who's not straight?!". Its definitely juicier than who is right? Though there were some jaw dropping names, but its all jus hear-say. I'll jus take it as I know a new gossip medium, yummy.....

Imagine this scenerio.
I was doing my research on all the artistes in Singapore. I divided them into 2 categories, 'Male', 'Female'.
When I was on the Female group, Female colleague shouts, "wah.. so many pretty girls. I want to see! I want to see!".
When I was at the Male Group, Male Colleague went, "oh... So handsome...." Points to one, "Who's that?! So cute".

You tell me, Confusing or not?!
I mus be in the Circus.

END

Na bei. Whats with my tagboard?!

Goodbye Bret... Goodbye....

2007-01-16T00:38:00.000+08:00

If someone ever ask me, "Which is the worst day of your life? ".
I would say its the day you left me Bret. You left me for good on Monday morning. You clinged on for 4 days and you finally have to go. I know you held on for me and I thank you for that. You took it like a man and didn't make a single cry from the torture. For 3 nights I stayed by your limp body crying, knowing that you're gonna leave me but at the same time I was hoping you could stay. The family was with you when you left but it was too much for all to take. Its all too much for ME to take. The struggle you made during the last mins of your life is deeply imprinted in my head. It was such pain at the moment that I begged and screamed for you to just go. I blamed God for not letting you leave peacefully, instead, you left in such torment. But maybe Mich is right, you couldn't let go too. You couldn't bear to leave us, but your time was up.

The house was especially cold and quiet after we left you for cremation.
I miss you Bret, I miss you very much. I miss hearing the clippings of your nails when you trottle around the house, I miss your snores for they have become my lullabies. I miss you resting your head on my lap. I miss the way you demand for food. I miss scratching and stroking you. I miss pillow fighting with you. I miss the angry sore loser you were. I miss looking at you using your paw as a cushion for your head. I miss looking at the way you walk, I miss you sneaking onto my bed, I miss you snuggling up next to me & I certainly miss your barks. I love your cool attitude, responding to our calls only when you feel like it. I miss the way you jump up from your sleep looking for us when the TV is turned off and you know its time for bed in the room. You would only step into the room when the aircon is turned on. I miss hugging you. I miss your complaints at the door for leaving you alone in the house. I miss your different expressions. I miss your smell. Every spot of the house has a trace of you. But all these went away with you. I no longer own any of them......

I was able to conquer my fear for darkness when I was a young gal simply because I know that you were jus next to me. Thank you Bret. Thank you for the wonderful 13 years. Thank you for all the joy you brought to me, the joy to the Seah-s. No one else can do a better job. As I promise you, I will be fine and you will always be in my heart. But for the moment, please let me bend the rules a little. As every thought of you comes with tears.

It really breaks my heart to see & touch your stiff lifeless body. I can never forget the way you died but theres so much good memories to remember you by as well.

So, Goodbye Bret. Farewell my boy. Make your way to Heaven and enjoy your new journey.
If theres ever a next life, I'll see you then.
I Love You Darling. You wll always be in my heart.
Goodbye Bret. Goodybye...

Dedicated to:

Realisation - 2006

2006-12-30T05:57:00.000+08:00

Wow... Its been more than a month since I written anything on this blog. I simply had nothing in mind to write about until today. On this 2nd last day of 2006, I received a parcel. Its a parcel packed with Japanese goodies and gifts from Hitomi, my Japanese friend. I got to know her through an exchange programme during my poly days. I was so touched when I saw the contents in the box that really, no words can describe how I felt. It made me reflect. I realised what a lousy friend I have been. I haven't shown much concern to many. I came to understand that I have changed.

In the past 2 - 3 years of finding myself, I realised I have actually lost a part of me as well. I have indulged myself into pain, cruelty of humans, reality of life, having fun, enjoy life and really ... just myself. It was all about me. I think because I missed all that during my younger days that I decided to just let myself go, for once, live for myself, be selfish. What I didn't realise is that its been a long time in this indulgence that I got use to it and I couldn't bring myself back to the right track. Though I have been there for the new friends that I have made, for those who have been crossing my paths, closer to how I live, I have neglected those who have distant.

I ask myself, Wheres the Jolene who has more sympathy? Wheres the Jolene who cares about all her friends? Wheres the Jolene who has all the motivation and passion for work? Wheres the Jolene who shares the housework with her mum? Wheres the Jolene who prioritizes her family? Wheres the Jolene who spends carefully? Wheres the Jolene who loves tidiness? Wheres the Jolene who actually bothers..? Not that I lost all that completely, but I guess most of it.... This realisation made me feel like 2003 - 2006 has actually only been a year. But in reality, its not. Everything seemed to be sandwiched together. So much so late, too little time. I have become... (especially these past 6 months) more selfish, the impatient me has become more impatient, temper getting worse, complaints getting more and I have this "cannot be bothered" attitude, "deal with it later", but in the end, I don't. I tend to avoid problems. Well, of cos unless I was left with no choice. I'm like what Zoe Tay is like in her drama. Just wanna sleep all day with no motivation for anything at all.

I'm not saying I'm a horrible person, I know I'm not, but I would like some of the old me back. I can be better. These 3 years haven't been a waste either. I learnt so much, the hidden Jolene was somehow unleashed and has matured. I had never imagined I can be what I am today. I learnt how bitter and sweet love is, the facts of life and what a bitch it can be. I learnt how time can really take pain away. I am definitely not the gullible gal I used to be, I come to realise how some things work and how some just don't no matter how stubborn you can be. Most importantly, I learnt how to protect myself. I travelled quite alot too..... I gained great new friends and I really can't ask more from them.

So 2007, I want to be better. The old and new Jolene is what I want. Let her walk through future proud and upright.

Happy New Year peeps.
I might just call.

11 Ways to Get Into Your Bosses' Good Books.

2006-11-16T00:51:00.000+08:00

1) Own a Chio Face (Pretty Face)
- If you have this, which is the most important thing in the list. No matter how many dumb mistakes you make, how un-contributive you are and how people hate you. Just an innocent look and a few blinks of the eyes, its NEVER your fault. Really... Someone else will have to take your blame.

2) Be His "Kah Gia" (Spy)
- Update him with all the situations, actions and gossips on every single living thing in the office. Make stories up to make yourself look good or make others seem worse. Inform him of anyone who bad-mouth about him. [Watch your tongue people!]

3) Carry His Balls (Unless he doesn't have any)
- This is to prevent them from falling. Ah... haha.. Crap. Polish them as much as you can, if he doesn't have any, make him feel like he has them on. "Boss, you're so smart!", "Boss, you look good in those sunglasses!", "Sir, your house so nice and big!", "GM ah..., " OOps! Did I say... the "G" word?

4) Be a YES SIR Man/Woman
- No matter how stupid, how illogical his theory or suggestions can be just say, "Yes Boss!", "Yes Sir!". And SMILE people SMILE.

5) Take Other People's Credit
- Someone does you a favour, does a good job. CLAIM that you did it! Even if you didn't report it as yours, but Boss assumes you did a great job, keep quiet..... Sssh.... Let the good souls suffer in silence.... Ssssh... [For kind souls die first.]

6) Be a Smart Alec
- Come up with all sorts of ideas. Those that he never seen or heard off, and impress him. For HE, will be mesmerized. The more unnecessary or troublesome it is, the more he'll be impressed.

7) Look Busy
- IF you have things to do, announce to the whole world. Run here and there with documents. Tell the whole office what you're busy with and how much headaches its been giving you!

8) Always Be A Victim
- When theres conflicts or trouble, stretch out your warm hands, look innocent. Then go around sutlely telling your colleagues why you are cleaning up other people's shit. You're kind enough to help out but it made you so busy. It's not your job..... Do a Big Sigh and walk away slowly after you finish your whinings. Remember to look very disturbed and troubled.

9) Pretend to be the Mediator
- Whenever theres a conflict, try to dig up as much as you can. Then pretend to settle the problem by talking to both parties. But actually... Stir up more trouble!! Its your main goal.

10) Have a wide network
- The most crucial protection gear. You know so many people, so many officers that your boss wouldn't have the guts to touch you. He may hate you but he can't touch you. Because, you bring in the business. People will scream if you leave. With this, you can scream at people, express your displeasure immediately to him if theres anyone you're unhappy with. The whole office can hate you, but they can't do anything TO you.

11) Be a Tongue - Wagger
- Finally, the most lethal weapon. Be it True or False. Be it a Fact or an Assumption. Just spread the news baby! Watch, as people slash at one another. Listen, as the news spreads to the Boss's ears. Because, being the Boss's spy, he'll approach you when he gets any wind of anything. You'll be called in.

If you don't posses any of the abilities/assets above.
Leave your job.
Like me! :D

CUTS

2006-11-02T23:01:00.000+08:00

1st CUT

Yup. I did it. I snipped my hair. After 2 years of irritation for keeping it long, to months of struggling with my decision of having it back short. I did it. And I luv it. For the way it looks, for the way it makes me feel, and for being me. I'm really not a gal of hassles. After the cut, I finally accepted this fact. I just like things simple and easy. Which... Can also be equivalent to being Lazy.

2nd CUT

Another thing that I have cut myself off from, is my work. Yes. I am gonna join the "Job-Less Club" real soon. After much advise, coaxing, gossiping, nagging and blah blah blah from various people, especially one person who just can't wait for me to say "BYE" to the shit-hole. I gave the white letter to my Superior. Also another decision that took me months to make. Of course i'm not leaving purely because of what people said. I mus be crazy to do that. But really, its not a place for me. This place, jus makes my morale low, confidence low, mood low... Everything jus 'down' there, cos the people I work for simply think they are 'up' there. Hiaks. Dumb-asses. Though there are bastards and bitches that I can't wait to wave goodbye to, there are also people and things I find, hard to leave. I can't bear to just give up all my work too. They are like my babies, from workshops to events. They are like unborn children... Especially 2 big projects that I have done all on my own, from nothing to slowly evolving into something. It's a little heartaching to know that I won't be there for their birth. Being the 23rd person of Year 2006 to tell the Club that they should really F off. I know this is the right decision, but I find it hard to convince myself sometimes. Maybe its the "whats out there ??" that gives me the shivers. It's a tougher road ahead of me, I'm nervous but at the same time excited. I hope this time, I really get what I want, not what I need. Bless me.

3rd CUT

This is it. After 3 years of pain and fatigue. Its done deal. I have cut myself from "___". Not physically... But mentally and emotionally. I'm sure of it this time. No more tears, aches, anger or suspicions. For now, all I have to this is 'shrugs'. I have grown much from here. An experience never will be forgotten nor taken. I learnt well. Though it took long.... Pick myself up and I walk again.

I love the CUTS.
For I'm Free.
CUTS: Freedom brought to me.

My Very Slow Heartbeat

2006-10-09T23:58:00.000+08:00

Ok. This din really bothered me till what my HRM told me today. Honestly, I din even wanna talk about it but now, I'm a wee bit worried...

Went for my medical checkup last week which I have dragged on due to my BZ schedule and of cos a cut of my laziness.. After much nagging from the admin dept for me to go, I finally did it. And oh man.... it ain't good news. The doc using her watever-scope listened to my heartbeat like a zilion times and said its not normal. She said she hear weird sounds and my heart rate is low... When I look at her expression, I can see how 'looow' she meant. So off she sent me to take some ECG test in the other room. This nurse stuck some sticky stuff all over me, from my chest all the way down to my foot. The machine started prinitng results, "zip.. zip... zip..". The next thing I hear is "huh??!!" Its the exclaimation from the nurse. Then she said "weird. Do it again." Nurse definitely not helping.... "zip zip zip.." I hear "A...... Why like that? " Still not helping here. Then I ask her, "is it bad??" Then she suggested we do a third time. And I passed. Its suddenly all normal. But Doc said, Nooooo. Not normal. She showed me the graphs and its like Shares..? Stable for a while and it just suddenly soar upwards like the fountain in bugis junction. She referred me to National Heart Centre, which I have to go this Thursday morning.. I gave her a "Are you serious???" look. Damn. Shes serious.

Well, after the check-up. I decided to stay positive and I get on with life as per normal even though my whole office is making a drama out of it. One even said, "No wonder you always so tired! Cos ur heart pump slow then ur head not enuff oxygen!" [she claimed shes serious abt it.] Ewww... They made jokes too! How evil.... I still play tennis, drink some booze (Martini Lychee... I like...), do some dance, play some pool and gorge myself with some sushi. Totally putting the slow beat shit outta my mind.

Right up to today.. My dear HRM said she spoken to her Doc Sis-in-law abt my situation and she said if its serious theres only 2 ways. 1) Do a bypass surgery. 2) Insert a stimulator to my heart. I don't wanna be cut up!! *sobs* And she comes up with some story on her fren who suddenly feels tired all the time and just died of liver cancer. Then she told me to be careful and do something abt it, cos my heartbeat might just stop like that. And it seemed like i'm taking it lightly and still so damn relax. Thank you very much. So I asked her, "What can I do now? I can't do anything until the results are out right?" OK. I admit I do feel tired & sleepy rather often, but its only when i'm not doing anything or doing something that doesn't quite interest me. Like when I'm working, when i'm in lectures, when I'm taking the train or bus. I do feel breathless once in a while, but in some situations, lemme tell ya. I'm more awake & energetic than anyone else.

Urgh.. Enuff of lamenting.... 2 bad news from my grams and uncle is enuff for all to take. I dun wanna be in the list. For now, I can only pray hard that I'm in fact 'unique' and not 'abnormal'. Like what I told Mich. I rather Chiong and die on the dancefloor than Moan and die in bed. Hows that?!

A Day of Royalty

2006-10-05T22:55:00.000+08:00

Last Sunday, a really generous colleague of mine treated Mich n Me to a Spa & Wellness Centre in Paragon. Well, when Jenn (Mrs Generous) first told me that we're going for Spa, I expected something good. But Wow! NotTHIS good.

The place is huge, 22000 sq feet if I dun remember wrongly. As 3 of us were all using the same facial specialist (cos Jenn insisted shes the best & she wants no other), we have to take turns and wait for each other. We were each given a locker, a set of bathrobe and night wear made of silk and off we went. The architecture of the place is rather fantastic. Even the shower looks somehow stylish! The jacuzzi has these chairs in it where u can lie on and let the bubbles do the job. Feel damn shiok can! After Jacuzzi, you're suppose to dip urself into this special built ice cold pool to close your pores. Its really icy cold... Brrr..... Then they have the steam room, and the sauna room with TV in it. After that, you can just dump your wet nightie anywhere you want and a new set is provided. Everytime you walk out of the pools, in 5 secs there is someone to dry the floor up with the wiper. So no worries you will slip man. The shower has everything, from shower gel to conditioner, then all sorts of toiletries are provided. From hair dryer to hair mousse, to face toner and even some high class oil for the hair. And man! It doesn't stop here.

Still waiting for your turn?? No worries, step into the lounge. You're served with a spread of buffet snacks. Eat all you want. Thats not all. Theres are ala carte main courses which u can order as many times as you want, and of cos the desserts too. Head to the VIP room, slouch on the leather couches, there are movies and magazines available. ITs your choice. Every few mins waiters will walk in and serve you asking if you need anything. All these while waiting for your turn.

Oh its my turn for some facial. Theres high tech machines and cool masks to make you feel beautiful. After that back to the room to relax.

As we were slacking in the room with our silky bathrobe, I told Mich, "Mich, this is what I call life man..." Oh yeah... This IS life. This IS Free. I literally felt like I was Zhang Ziyi in "The Banquet". I really felt like a Queen on that day.

Thanks Jenn! For this one of a kind experience. I will be there one day. On my own Expense... I must. Its just too good. Way too good..

I'm sure you can see what i mean.

Crazy Little Thing

2006-09-28T23:28:00.000+08:00

Last Week I was shopping for a card and I happen to see another card.
I bought it without second thoughts.
The card goes like this....

On the outside it wrote:

"They say SACRIFICE is a part of life.
That life is not worth living if there is no PROBLEM to solve.
That BURDEN makes us stronger and TROUBLE keeps life moving.
That a life without HARDSHIP, STRESS or STRAIN is a life that's going down the drain.
So tell me...."

On the inside:

"How Can I Live Without You?
Happy Birthday!"

Yup. The card is now nicely kept in my drawer.
It's for my future "somebody" I assume, whom hasn't existed as yet.
So, this is the little crazy thing I did last week.
But oh well..... I'm very please with it :)

I LOVE to Travel!!

2006-09-26T01:22:00.000+08:00

2004

Sept - Its Singapore! My First Stop! Dangerously Memorable. A Forbidden City.

Sept - Indonesia. Its Hot Hot Hot. Phew....

Oct - Malaysia. Wet and Humid. Wrong weather, Right Attitude.

2005

March - Sweden.... A rather pleasant journey. Too cold sometimes. The scenery was beautiful though.

May - England. I only got a foot in, but one of the sweetest and greatest Country. Such a dazzling sight. Love the Scottish accent. I will trottle thru one day.

Dec - Its Texas Baby! Eeee Har!!! A Thrill Ride indeed! See the horses run wild!

2006

March - How the Hell did I get into Malaysia again?! Anyway, my friend paid for the trip. COst her a bomb. What a sai trip. Yucks! Pui! I feel you pal. Thanks for the free trip.

Hmm... Haven't been traveling for a while... Think its time to go again.
Can I?
Told ya I LOVE Travelling!

New Song New Feel

2006-09-19T00:39:00.000+08:00

No Ryhme or Reason.
I just Fell For It the moment I Heard It.

- I -

2006-09-17T20:10:00.000+08:00

What kind of person am I? I'm sometimes baffled too. You may think otherwise for what I'm gonna say about myself, but hey! Feel free to correct me. I do have the "Bitch Here" Column on the right.

I'm one person who simply can't hide my emotions. Those who are close to me knows this for sure. If I'm unhappy aka I'm pissed at you, I can't hide it. I'm never successful in doing that, its written all over my face "I'm pissed with you." And it disturbs the people ard me. As hard as I try, I jus cant. So if you see my eyes drifting when you're talking to me, no smile on face, *Bingo* you're in for a hard time. Cos all you will get is silence and ignorance. So watch out for these tiny eyes, for they tell alot. It takes alot for those whom I feel negative about to make me like them. I admit I am a very judgemental person, and I judge really quick. But it's not death sentence yet, though close. If you're someone I treasure, believe me. I can do anything for you. And I do mean anything. I go all out. I can be really forgiving no matter how shitty you treated me and I'm almost at your beck and call. I can be really generous I can be really selfish. I can be real nice but I can be real nasty too. So its really quite a contrast. Honestly, I'm rather soft-hearted. If you know the way, you can easily get through to me. I cry darn easily, I cried a pack of tissue watching "Monster Inc." so... you know what I mean. I'm a cry baby.

My reaction to stuff are immediate. eg. We were playing pool one day, I was about to pot a ball when some teen boy unknowingly gave me a shove at the back with his big ass and the ball went crooked. My reaction ---> "wah lau a! Tamade!" *then turned around facing the boy I said* "its ok". Then turned back, "wah lau! I was aiming the ball properly liao leh! Wah lau! Spoil my game!" I think the boy was kinda shock and Mich + Robson just wanna dig a hole and hide themselves. Of cos, in the end I lost the game. I KB non-stop thru out the game and blame it all on the boy. How not surprising.... Well, thats just me. My reactions to situations are always rather drastic and immediate. But after I calm down, I do a nice job. Organized and nicely laid out. Thoughts sorted out.

I'm full of crap, and when I have to crap, I simply can't keep it. I just let it all out and blabber non-stop. If I know you well, you will get lots of it. Expect something like ermmm..... 24hrs of it?? eg. We were in a really crowded lift, but there was absolute silence. Someone was listening to his MP3 with music blasting from his ears. Its you know the kind of Indian music with the trumpet going "nei nei nei"... Then *ding* a thought hit me. I asked Mich, quite audible to all in lift. "Where's the snake?". Mich tried very very hard to curb her laughter but at the same time feeling rather embarrassed. *Sense of achievement here* hee hee... I'm a really noisy girl, if I'm unusually quiet, its only becos 1) I'm Sad. 2) I'm with strangers. 3) I don't feel comfortable with you. 4) I'm filled with thoughts. I love having fun, when it comes to play, I have unlimited amount of energy. All can collapse except me, still super hyper.

I think alot. Especially when its quiet at night and I'm alone. Really deep thoughts just come to me. I'm a simple person with complicated thoughts.

So Love me Or Hate me. For I'm Just ME.

Links

2006-08-29T00:00:00.000+08:00

Since young, I have always been amazed by how fate brings people together. I'm not saying base on BGR only. I'm saying all sorts of relationships. Human to Human; the links.

How specifically or how strongly do I believe in fate? Much. I can go as detailed as this. "Wow. It's amazing.. If that didn't happen, I wouldn't have met you again and we won't be this close." or "If I haven't met XX , I wouldn't have been in this stage. I wouldn't have open my eyes to the world like that. I wouldn't have seen so much. I would have been a different person altogether." That kinda thing. I sound like a stupid freaky gal I know. But, its me.

And so, of course, it does impact me rather deeply on how fate pulls people apart too. Especially for those I care very much for. Its tough. It's like you took a long time to build a castle, without you knowing, earthquake came and the whole castle crumbles within a split second. It's so fast, you find it hard to believe. And you took awhile more to accept the simple fact. No one there to rebuild it, even if there is, its a different one. May be a better one but you may never see one. It's gone. And the most irritating fact is, you can't control it. Cruel.

Having someone you walked almost every street with, you do omost everything with and say omost everything to. Today, you are left with superficial stuff. You talk about things that didn't use to matter at all, you're left with "Hi, how have you been?" or worse still.... You dun tok at all. You can stroll the same streets, do the same things, say the same words but you walk alone. It's truly sad. Cos all you can do is just sigh, then take a deep breath, a shrug of shoulders, smile and tell yourself its time to move on. Everything seemed so familiar but feelings so different.

Partners turned Strangers.
Friends turned Acquaintances.
Enemies turned Allies.

Of course, a twist of fate and the coin may jus filp.

In the end, believe it or not. Its not up to You or Me.

"Click" & let your troubles "Drift" away....

2006-08-14T23:23:00.000+08:00

Took a short break away from work. I had a good 4 days of rest. In these 4 days, I did practically nothing. I tink my eyes and mouth were the only parts of me that were moving most. All I did was sleep, eat and watch TV, movies. I jus gorged myself with food (mum has been feeding her gal pretty well) and be happily entertained with the box. I did swim for a day, tried to tan but it rained most mornings, played pool on Sat watched the fireworks. Its none contributive to the society. But hey! I feel darn good!

Watched "click", "the breakup", " the ant bully" & "Fast n Furious; tokyo drift".

Kinda surprised that "click" actually made me cried more than i laughed. Its not fantastic, but it does depict the truth that sometimes we just want to click some situations away. Fast forward it. like.... my mum nagging at me?! my boss giving me shit?! the long meetings, arguments.. but its these that completes life. Life can't jus be about happy stuff, we need the shit to live a better and happier future. But honestly, pass me the remote & I will still gif that little gimmick a 'click'. :p

"the breakup" hmm.... its just a movie about a couple who just can't communicate? Thats it. Sorry Aniston, as much as i luv u, its crap. But dun be sad, at least u've gotten Vince. Though u look too perfect for him but maybe theres no such thing as the perfect couple. Look at Brad, he's got the sexy but ultimately crazy cum 'love the children' Jolie. Shes not perfect either. I somehow feel these 2 couples may just last. Good job Vince. *pats on back* ewww.... its none of my bloody business. Move on, Jo!

"ant bully" ... its a movie that I was forced to watch? haha... cos i have a chip fren who luvs luvs luvs cartoons? It did remind me that we do things that ain't right cos we are angry. So anger actually clots our brains and pushes us to do dumb things. Anyway, its a great movie for little kids. Not for me though.... A kid, but a BIG kid orite!

"fast n furious; Tokyo drift" Cars, babes, and more babes. I was clenching my teeth for most of the scenes, cos its damn nerve wrecking. And it does in fact gives a teenie weenie bit of life lessons. Dun tink about the story, it'll ruin the movie. Jus enjoy the ride.

*fireworks* Haven't felt so free, so peaceful for a long time. I was actually working, bringing my members of 5 boats to watch the fireworks (some event that I created). I was glad i was there. Wow... mesmerizing. Its jus so beautiful. Jus sitting there on the tip of the boat, drifting, so close to the picture of beautiful colors. I can't really describe the feeling. I had no family or frens there wif me then. But i just felt right in place. Suddenly, work doesn't seem that bad, life doesn't seem that miserable. I call it "the moment". I remember the last time i felt like this was when i was in the States. Quote from 'Tokyo Dirft': "At that moment, everything just disappears. no past, no future, no problems."

Its the moment that matters. I realised moments are created by oneself. I did not create the fireworks of course. But i created the chance to be there, to feel it. So kudos to myself.
And hereby, I hope for many more 'moments' to come. ;)

Its cliche, but life is really too short to be unhappy. Chip's right, be it good or bad, its not gonna last. We have our very own remote actually, we have choices. Either click our troubles away or let it stay and haunt us. Of course there will be times/things that will make me angry or sad. But I wun let it stay long enuff to hurt me. What's gone is gone, I have to accept that. At least what's here is still here. :)

Have a Happy Life.

O.K.

2006-08-05T16:47:00.000+08:00

Recently, quite a few people have been asking me. "How's life?"
My answer to that has been, "ok lor..." And I will stress it to them again after that, "its really OK only." I dunno wat I am trying to tell them OR expect them to do. But life has become pretty stale for these past 2 weeks.

Have you ever felt like this?
What you use to have fun in isn't fun anymore.
What you use to enjoy so much isn't enjoyable anymore.
The work that you had so much passion for isn't passionate anymore.
The home you feel oh so comfortable in isn't comfy anymore.
You dun even feel like talking at all sometimes.

Everything seem to be so still... so boring... so not in place.
Yea.. I keep having this feeling that something is missing and life just don't feel right this whole time.
You drag your feet to almost everything that you need to do. Even the things you want to do becomes only a need and you are so damn close to "forcing" yourself to do it only becos you have to. Theres just no kick in anything at all.

I dunno how long this is gonna last but I hope it ends soon. Cos if this goes on any longer I have a strong feeling that I'm gonna be autistic. An OK life just isn't enuff. An OK life is not for me. An OK life just ain't OK no more.

I need some spark here. Maybe I need a vacation... Someone please pack me up and take me somewhere. Bangkok? Phuket? Bintan? or even Bali again... Whatever. I dun even care if the tsunami's gonna hit me.

I'm a spoilt kid. So what.

##And having to work on a Saturday from 2pm - 10pm really doesn't f**king help.

The Things We Do

2006-07-28T22:35:00.000+08:00

This is a post about Karyn, Michelle and Jolene. All about the things they do together/do to each other.

From This (2004)

To This (2006)

The Disgusting things:

1) Taitai aka Karyn, likes to thump her feet onto the ground and show us how her flabby tummy vibrate while doing that.
2) Jolene likes to slouch onto her seat and display her layered caterpillar tummy.
3) We had to face Michelle's Wrinkled Flowered Ah Ma paper panties for nearly 5 consecutive weeks.
4) We play with food that is processing in the mouth. eg. Tai tai uses brownie to look like a bo gei(toothless) ah ma. (See Below)

5) Mich and Jo pretends to dig nose in front of camera.

6) Mich farts whenever she wants to. Only when u smell something and ask who did it then she will happily admit its her.
7) All 3 likes to act chio in front of camera.
8) Jo squeezes oil clog out and exhibits to curious taitai and Mich.
9) Mich and TaiTai plugs armpit hair in front of Jo. Mich nearly did it on Jo's bed somemore!

Urgh! ok. In order to keep your appetite, I shall stop here. Cos theres many more disgusting things.

The Funny Things:

1) Mich while in her dreams took Taitai's face for a Tv studio controller and tried to adjust it like joystick.
2) Mich walks towards a shop getting ready to go in and sales person slams the "closed" sign right in her face. She stood there looking shocked and lost.
3) Jo freaking out when she sees balloon lurking around her.
4) Jo and Mich pulling sacarstic jokes at each other while taitai sits and watches happily.
5) Jo losing her patience wif irritating kids, losing her temper and screaming on dance floor at the irritating crowd.
6) Taitai making monkey faces and posing "naked" at bathroom door. Not really naked lah.
7) Taitai sleeping wif her Hp resting on her tummy and her hand under her awkward positioned head. It's like she broke her neck or something.

The Loving Things:
1) Massaging and scrubbing each other's feet. Ever nice taitai doing both Mich's and Jo's feet while Mich and Jo did one foot each of taitai's.
2) Jo cooked for hungry Taitai and Mich.
3) Jo always wakes up earliest so that Taitai and Mich can sleep more.
4)Taitai and Jo stripped pissed drunk Mich to her bra and panties, forced her into her PJs and tucked her into bed.
5) Mich always listening to Jo's and Taitai's shit, slaps the ultimate truth in a sutle way.
6) Taitai always listening to Mich's and Jo's shit, slaps ultimate truth in a sweet and nice way.
7) Jo always listening to Mich's and Taitai's shit, slaps the ultimate truth in no other way but right at their faces.

These three are naked with each other. I dun mean it literally. We cry to each other, we bitch to each other, we laugh AT each other and we share dirty thoughts with each other. Theres jus nuttin to hide among us. No hidden thoughts, no embarrassments, no secrets. Thats the beautiful part of this whole frenship.

Lemme present you a few examples, "Wah lau Mich... Ur taste damn bad leh....", "Can you be any more stupid?!", "Dun be dumb can?", "Knn... CCB... Shuddup lah, You Bitch." (only between Jo & Mich, taitai will neve do this), "wah... Ni hao jian o.", "See! Told you long ago this will happen right?!", "Don't always give way to him/her can." + many many more.

Of cos there are times when we dun agree with each other. We are in fact different in many ways. But we accept and not reject. We not only hear but listen, we not only look but see, we appreciate watever is said or done. Bottomline is, we appreciate each other.

trust me. Not many can take our kind of joke, especially the really evil ones, our cruel way of caring for each other, our way of crazy, silly fun and our really big load of rubbish cock. But we just so happen to meet and be able to take each other's shit. I guess we got lucky... ;P

So kudos to Karyn and Michelle. Thanks for the 2 half years, thank you for going thru all my joy and pain. From the dumps to the heights. I have grown the most during this period. This roller coaster ride can't be anymore enjoyable without ya. And may this journey not end without you too.

Love ya Bitches to bits!

Written : 28 April 06
Edited & Published : 28 July 06

P.S. Not forgetting dear Bell & Rynn. Thanks mates! For Everything...
Love ya babes too!

Someone Shoot Batman's Bird

2006-07-18T23:53:00.000+08:00

Who am I toking about? Its ROBIN, who literally is like the "Robin" in Batman's show. Useless. For show nia. This guy is full of ego and pride, a snail and sloth at work, and he always uses this laughter after some lame excuses to cover up his ass. Which doesn't work for me, in fact, doesn't work for anybody. This PR assistant in my office really pissed me off today. Ok, forgive me, I have to say this again! He really PISSED me off! There! Feel slightly better.

He is suppose to do up my A&P for my event today. And I specifically indicated "ASAP". What do I get? NONE. Nothing never mind, gave me a load of frustrations somemore. He can't do my stuff unless he finishes this write-up which he INSISTED that he wanted to do for the newsletter like a month ago??!! And now, deadline is up and he hasn't done any at all??? And I can totally see that he's regretting his egoistic move. Lemme tok abit about the write-up. This is actually about the trip that he and I brought the members to in JB 4 weeks ago. HE, forgot everything about it! I MEAN ZERO. Nothing at all. For this stupid write up of his, he came to me like a zillion times to ask me this and that.

"A Jolene, u remember where we went for the trip not? The Itenary and stuff like that."
"A Jolene, u remember how many people in total not?"
"A Jolene, u remember the oldest lady in our group not? Whats her name har? "
"A Jolene, u remember whats the name of that Hainanese guy not? I want to call him."
"A Jolene, u remember how old is the youngest child in the tour not? Whats her name ah?"
"A Jolene, u remember wats the name of the shopping centre we went to not?"
"A Jolene, u remember if our members bought any of the honey orange at the fruit farm not?"
"A Jolene, u remember wat we ate during the buffet lunch not?"

Hello People, my first name is A, last name Jolene.
knn....
When I asked him "why din u write the article earlier, its been a month." Guess wat the Bird said.....
"I'm a BZ man."

I was omost there after the above. The ultimate came when he said this, "Why dun you write the article instead?" Fuck No?? I gave him a nasty look and told him off abit. Thats when he backed off.

I hereby pronounce that Robin the BIRD, is the No.1 animal in the Office Hit-list. He's practically everyone's target.

Someone shoot the bird which only happen to be standing on a tall tree but thinks it's flying please...

Simple Explicit Analysis on L.O.V.E.

2006-07-12T00:42:00.000+08:00

An Inspired Piece by Michelle Lee Ah Siong, Meliorated by Jolene Seah ZhaoRu.

Love is like Lao Sai (diarrhea).

It hits you suddenly.

It is unwanted yet painful and cannot be controlled.

When you forcefully hold it, it hurts so much.

When you let it go, feels damn shiok.

END.

Half of this piece came out of nowhere, the other half in the toilet while Lao Sai-ing...
Really explicit rite....

Abnormal

2006-07-10T12:24:00.000+08:00

Jo meets her buddies Bell & Rynn.
Complains Complains Complains.
Waits for positive Reaction and Support.....

Bell: Jolene ah, you're not normal leh.

Jo: huh??! I'm not normal?

Bell: Yah lah. You wanna see Pyschologist not?

Jolene: har?

Bell: The prob lies in you. And you know what to do. So difficult mehz...?

Rynn: We not like you so hard-hearted lor...

Jo: yah lor yah lor! (Enthusiastically, trying to be defensive)

Bell: I really dun see what's so difficult lor. Please love yourself more.

With that.... Jolene is enlightened.
Just like that.
A Simple Fact.
The fact that she wants to be normal :)

Are You Your Own Problem?

2006-07-10T12:12:00.000+08:00

Ok. Before this starts, I must must declare that I got this from my Sis's blog. Sorry Sis, I forgot to ask you for it before you left for Aussie. Call your lawyer if you want to, but this paragraph here is simply too good to be missed. So forgive me.

{In the movie Wolf, Jack Nicholson says in his role: "you're very beautiful and you think men are only interested in you because you're beautiful. but you want them to be interested in you because you're you. the problem is, aside from all that beauty you're not very interesting; you're rude, you're hostile, you're sullen, you're withdrawn. i know: you want someone to look past all that, at the real person underneath. but the only reason anyone would look past all that is because you are beautiful. it's ironic, isnt it? in a cold way, you are your own problem."}

Everyone say "oooh......................."
uh - huh..... I took this long to see that.
Better late than never I guess.

It's A Small World After All

2006-07-03T04:12:00.000+08:00

I have never felt the World can be this small till I saw what I saw. And suddenly, I wanted to feel small too. I didn't find what I was seeking but saw what I didn't expect to see. I felt like I got ran over by a truck out of nowhere. The smiles on others can actually be a punishment to you. My mind went blank for a few seconds and then it was filled with all sorts of flashes till like it was gonna blow.

The World was never that small till the unwanted is seen.
The World was never that ugly till the lies unfold.
The World was never that unsafe till whom you stand for turns against you.

The deafening noise around suddenly turned to silence.
The smiling face unexpectedly turned to despair.
Knees weakened. Stomach churned.
Hard to swallow. Felt like throwing up.

What I thought was gone hasn't left after all.
It just all came rushing back at me.

How Crude.
How Cruel.

Its The REAL World After All.

Hello People...

2006-06-14T01:47:00.000+08:00

Hello People...
Its been long.... Well, its mostly bcos I have started work and I sleep rather early these days cos I have to get up early for work. Not like super early but early enuff to stop me from hogging online thru the late nights. Not really use to working life just yet, probably bcos I played too much these 2 years. Its been omost 2 weeks since i started work, learnt quite alot and am rather BZ and will be rather BZ till June ends. Working as the Programmes Executive for one of the Country Clubs here. Same Company as Mich, which is quite a blessing cos we are practically the 2 youngest blood in this office. Its always nice to have ur close fren working wif u, I mean theres at least someone whom u can trust and bitch to everyday. LOL. Yes, we bitch everyday, not like anyhow lah. But whenever necessary, which is quite often, not in the office of cos. :p We are in different rooms anyway...

I serve the so called "Impt People" of the country, making sure they are having a good time in the club, making their miserable investments worthy. To put it simply, I have to come up with events and activities to keep these humans and their families entertained lah. And oso mus make sure its cheap and good, cos if not, will kana complain non-stop. Me dun like dealing with some members who are lao ah bei, who tinks they are superior cos of their past positions (retired) and oso bcos I heard from many that they are chi ko bei. They luv giving ridiculous complaints. Example: "Why the pub got a foosball table?! So low class.. Like coffeeshop like that!". Hmmm.... I dunno which exclusive kopitiam this ah bei went to got foosball table leh.... If thats consider low class, I really dunno wat high class is. Maybe.. If we put some beer ladies with pole dancing then its high class lo... Cos they will make ah bei very high. I'm glad I dun have to entertain them like my colleague has to. Whatever it is we are a non-profitble organization, which means we are charity organization(my personal view lah).

Anyway, an overview of my colleagues, the politics and the bosses. The most interesting person so far, is my partner, C. I'm in charge of social events, while she, the sports side. Shes a super direct, super loud person. If u can't tahan me, then dun even tink abt getting close to her. Cos C is 100 times worse. But, I do like C though. Shes taught me alot, is quite patient wif me(though not to many others in the office. I got lucky *winks*), and her directness always bring loads of laughter. I really prefer a direct personality rather than a backstabber. Alot of pp can't tahan her though, I have been asked by some oready, "You can work with C ah?". I'm like "yah..". duh... say "no" and let u all gossip mehz... But yah lah, im orite wif her. Jus as long as i dun step onto her tail then i wun kana blasting, lemme gif you a few examples of her funny ethics and her chor lor-ness.

1) C: "who?! Who told you that?! They can take off like that, we can't ah! Not in our position, think we so easy like them ah?! Ask them come change position wif me lah! Tell them dun TCLSS ah!"

Me: "Huh?! Whats TCLSS??"

C: "Talk Cock Like Sing Song lah!"

2) C(Jokingly over the fone but still loud): "Ask everyone to gather tomorrow afternoon and see me! wah.... I very dua liap hor! hahaha.... Dua liap like Ye Zhi mei's bao. Hahahaha..."

3) C (sings): "Theres something strange... In the neighbourhood... Who do you call?!" She stops here and waits.

Radio: "Ghostbusters!"

Then C continues singing...
Theres many more others, like those popular chinese songs in the 80s - 90s and theres Hokkien ones too. Soemtimes I do sing along. Quite fun. Alamak.. I hope I dun end up like her.

Move on to other people, who are mostly aunties and uncles. Mich has a super weird assistant with absolutely no sense of humour. Telling him jokes is like you are speaking to a Hippo, he totally doesn't understand it and takes it darn seriously. He's practically slow in everything he does, toking, response, playing badminton or tennis, etc. Sometimes he says weird things and he's so slow in response that you feel like punching him. Sometimes, I dun even wanna wait for his reaction. I jus move on, I tink Mich wanna punch him like a thousand times liaoz. Especially after the day he chokes onto a mouthful of rice and splattered everything on mich who is directly opposite. Theres other aunties in the office, there are those who are rather quiet and nice, there are those who are gossipy always gossiping non-stop. They dun have to say, but u can jus see it in their eyes. Got a pregnant front desk who has a squeaky voice but very auntie in behaviour who always is gossiping with her good fren Auntie LS (not Loser). Theres a super ego male colleague who die die mus win in badminton even though he drew with us in the last match. He kips blaming his partner (the slow one), and say Mich and I were lucky. You can imagine both of us rolling our eyes non-stop. But still, not a bad guy. There was a day when he suddenly blew his top at C and that kept her quiet and left her rather shocked. I was a little taken aback too. Cos he seemed a soft-spoken man. Now I fully understand the meaning of "Barking dog never bites". Then theres a manager who has like a thousand jobs beside the one now who is always going merry go round to either test you, wanna get gossipy info from you, insult you or gossip to you. But, despite all that, shes orite. Jus learn how to do tai chi along wif her and u r safe. She always fight for rights though, which I tink is good. Theres oready like 2 groups who are buay song wif each other among these people liaoz. Theres a nice Manager who always gifs me advice on life and my direct superior is a nice man too. He gifs me the freedom to do my thing and is open to ideas. Theres another manager who oready has a 5 year old child but still look damn good. Its like a fashion parade everday, but she doesn't seem very enthu wif her job, HAha.. I see her looking at the 'recruit' section of the newspapers. Last but not least is the GM, haven't really had any encounter anything wif him yet. But he's quite famous for his meow-ness, aka 'stinginess'. And he has a quick brain which watever u suggest to him has gotta do wif money, he will make you feel that ur suggestions are redundant. "I'm open wif ideas." Thats wat he always say, but doesn't necessary mean he will absorb them... Its not easy for him though I feel, cos he has to report to a bunch of humans who are actually aliens to business management but luvs to TCLSS. Oooh... rather useful abbreviation..

Thats the end of the story of my office, overall, i'm still ok with it cos I haven gotten anything bad yet. I'm still a green horn, so theres lots to learn and loads to take as well. Wah... Very long leh.. Cham... Am I an auntie oready? Doubt so.. Cos I ain't into no "ghostbusters!". I'm jus a woman. I have my special rights dun I?

Mai Dong Xi Chi Dong Xi

2006-06-01T22:47:00.000+08:00

Yup, I'm back. And I have even started work. Ah.. I'll tok abt that some other time. Lets first tok about my trip.

Hongkong... I did just 2 things, shop and eat. But hey! though its only those, I had enuff fun already. Terriffic time! Cos I bought 4 bags, 2 heels, a pair of bertula, a wallet, 6 tops and 2 jackets. All of these in just 5 days. Quite an achievement ain't it. We practically shopped the whole of Hongkong and of cos we practically ate all over Hongkong. We had dim sum (Imgaine: 2 gals, 9 different kinds of dim sum), loads of desserts, handbeat beef patties noodle, roast chicken, duck meat rice... I'm drooling by jus thinking about it. And Kristen's appetite can really scare the hell out of me. SHE, can really eat. God! And of cos shop too! To think she just came back from the states. arh....! We are really like what she said. "Partners in crime" We hit Mongkok, Tsim Sha Tsui, Causewaybay, and even the peak.

I had afternoon snack and beer at Stanley Market, we took the mini public bus there. Stanely Market is kinda like our Holland V, many caucasians, lots of bars for u to relax. Its kinda cool. We took the tram up to the peak. The sight was ok.. But its a different side of Hongkong, the air is so much better than way back below. The air pollution is horrible, I'm sure people there don't live long. We had dinner in one of the restaurants up in the peak, its nice. I can jus stone there for a long time. We stoned in Peninsula Hotel at Kowloon too, had desserts and we jus stone at the cafe facing the Victoria Harbour. There was a 'live' performance by a solo singer there. Feels rather comfy jus slouching on the couch. Walked a little in Zhong Wan while on our way to the peak, its kinda like our Shenton Way, with tall buildings all in their unique style. Especially the China Bank building, rather impressive.

Hongkong has got many old looking buildings, actually, they look as though they're gonna collaspe anytime. Can't believe the living conditions of the people there. And theres humans everywhere. We find it even difficult to walk sometimes, cos its so damn bloody crowded. Its amazing actually that we could walk quite a distance from one destination to another. If u're into walking, then Hongkong is the place for you. Cos everything seemed so far, even from one train to the other. But oh well... I always find it fun to indulge into another kinda culture once in a while.

As long theres shopping and food along the way, walking ain't no prob at all.

0805

2006-05-23T00:14:00.000+08:00

Yup.. at this time, I will be on my way to Hongkong. I think this trip came at the right time. I need a break. Away from here. I'm not feeling too good now at this place. Its somehow a little stifling.. Especially after last week's hectic schedule (having less than 3 hrs of sleep omost everyday), I need to move away for a while. But no matter what, the sleep depriviation nights are all worth it. The Friday show, like wat Preeya's sis calls it.. was a "Fantabulous" one.. I honestly feel we did a great job for this presentation. Everyone of us put in genunine amount of effort... Way to go Gals! Karyn, Preeya, Jingz and ME!

Had a couple of interviews, had a couple of rejects too over the weeks.. But oh well... it's life. I don't expect good news quick. I actually like the idea of falling into the ONE at my own sweet pace. Cos i definitely not wanna make a wrong choice. Hate the idea of being pushed and pressurized by those around me and end up getting a shitty job. Noe wat i mean..

Anyway, back to my trip. Oh yes! I so look forward to Hongkong. Gonna meet Kris there, who kips claiming that she put on tons of weight after US everytime she called over the last few weeks. I can forsee myself hearing the tape play time and time again on the same subject for the coming week. LOL. Bless me. She calls herself "fei chu"(cantonese) now. She gullibly said we wun be shopping but just looking around, eating, experiencing HK life. I truly doubt that, cos due to my past experiences wif HK, it ain't gonna happen. And Please... Miss Chua not shopping.. U mus be kidding! Even I can't resist lo..

So Hiong Gong! Ow lei la!!!
(Hongkong! Here I come!!)

-- --

2006-05-03T01:43:00.000+08:00

I simply can't think of any title for this post. Things happened so fast but yet when I was in the process of it, felt like its forever.

I was happily attending my cuzzie's wedding dinner on Sat night and right after the occasion I received this sms from a close fren of mine. "Jolene, my dad passed away." A healthy man, with no sickness, no history, no signs at all jus left his daughter and wife like that in his sleep. He's only 49.

I spent the next 2 days by the gal's side at the wake. She cried everytime she peeked into her dad's coffin. It pains her to see him like that, pale and stiff. I can feel that she doesn't want to see him becos she noes she will break down all over again. She needs to stay strong for her mum. But she wants to see him too becos she can't bear not to. Becos she wun be able to in future. It's hard. Really. It's hard for people our age especially. If it's a kid, he'll be too young to understand the pain, if lets say we got older maybe like at age 40+, we come to accept death, and at that time we would have fulfilled some of our responsibility to repay our parents. But now, it's tough. We jus started to carve a career of our own, and look forward to take the responsibility of giving to our folks, and if they didn't wait for that to happen. It's a feeling of mission unaccomplished, its a feeling of owing one so much and unable to return the favour. One so close that suddenly leaves you. It's painful. She was intending to bring the folks to Thailand for their first trip overseas during May.....

The thought of losing someone dear so suddenly really gives me the chill. It kept me thinking for 2 nights but I can't pinpoint what. It's jus a tough weekend.

My fren regretted some of the things she didn't do or did to him. I said everything to console her, but I know at that point of time it wouldn't help much. So I decided to just keep my silence on that, be by her side, cried with her, chatted casually and at times give her a supporting pat.

And so now, it's all over. Life goes on.... Doesn't it?

Time For Some Adjustment

2006-04-26T01:53:00.000+08:00

I'm gonna live a normal decent life for these four weeks to come. Not that my life has been indecent lah. Just that Clubbing seems not possible anymore, at least for the month. I need a break too anyway. Ain't good to have too much of it, Can get sick of it oso u noe. So late nights are not for me out there for the time being...

Michelle's gonna start work next week, and Kristen's not gonna be here till I see her in Hongkong.. And I see my other frens like only once in a blue moon cos they are all busy working... I foresee my life with not much activities available soon. In order to make it more productive, putting entertainment aside (theres always time for some fun). So many movies to catch in May somemore.... ok, back to my topic. I decide to list things that I should start doing.

First, Comes the vain part of me.

a) I desperately need to save my face. I have to clear the pimples, the black heads and watever! I want my flawless skin back!!!! Grr.. So after some professional pointers from Taitai and Milo today. I have to go buy scrub cleanser lah, mask lah, go facial lah, drink more water lah.. etc.. Knn.. All need money! Beauty has its price.

b) I need to lose some weight. Though I tink my frens heard me saying that like a zillion times, Im rather determined this time. I hate to see the extra bouncy flesh on my tummy, and arms and everywhere! So.. I shall use that OTO thingy my parents jus bought. And No!! ITs not the "Zap Zap here, Zap Zap there" thing! Its the one wif Sexy Karen Mok as their spokesperson. Not that i wanna be like her lah. But at least dun look pregnant i happy liaoz. Of cos i have to eat less and do more sports too. Its the basic criteria.. I know..

*I hate to face the mirror everytime and go "argh! argh! Get off me u ugly things! U pimples, U fats, U watever!" I wan to look chio!!! Shit! I'm becoming like Mich. Kaoz..

c) I want a good tan. Yea, I looked into the mirror during dance class after some tanning today and realised I look beta wif the tan. I jus look healthier and not so bui??? Though many said that "U look more feminine when u're fair. Fair is rare.." And Mummy will go "sai dao zhe me hei zhuo se mo??? Kan qi lai heng an zhan!! Bai cai mei!" (Translation - Tan till so dark for wat?! Look so dirty! Fair then pretty) But neh.. Haha.. I prefer tan. Sorry Mum.

d) Sleep normally. Yup. My unusual sleeping time or shld i say slackers' sleeping time has certainly worsen my skin condition. So ya. Have to do that, i Need beauty sleep.

Secondly, Cleanliness in room.

My room is disgusting. Its a mess.

a) Clear the dust. Lemme describe it this way, If an ant takes a stroll on my table, its like a football rolling on a Singapore Soccer field??? Get wat i mean. Ain't smooth. Yes. Thats how dusty my room is.

b) Clear the old mags and create some space for my other books and papers which are more useful. Which, are oso stacking up everywhere!

c) Change my bedsheet.

*Wah lau. Im hopeless! I'm becoming like... My sister!!! Yikes. Bad.

My future

a) Look for jobs. Send resumes. Make calls.

*Dun ask me why do it only now... Those who knows me will understand. I have my reasons and its not ridiculous!

b) Catch up wif my Jap Language. Cos obviously i'm not catching up.

Hongkong

a) Research. Look for the nice places to visit. Kristen's In USA, so it's my job and I have to bring her around. Cos I have been there like four times but the last one was like 4 years ago leh.. So research. Or else, gonna kana scolding.

*Can't wait for the trip which is like a month later.

Ok. Thats my list. Shall check it once in a while. Certainly hope it will all go as planned.
Wah lau! 2.30am liao! Saiz.... My beauty sleep!!! Here i come!!

He Just Wouldn't Let Me Play

2006-04-17T01:29:00.000+08:00

The weather has been like this for the past month!(Today is the worst I tink) Anyway, I'm damn fed up with it! I mean yah, you can do this. But WHY??! Why mus it be the time when I wanna play tennis??! Everytime! It really is #$&#($%^#*$^#&amp;$&(.

For the past 4 weekends, I haven't been able to play tennis because of the above. I put it on a sunday afternoon, it rains in the Sunday afternoon. K, so it happened twice on Sundays, we shall make a change and put it on Saturday. But NO! He just wouldn't let me play! He decided to change and have his mood swings on a Saturday too! And ta da!!! Sunday afternoon is bright and sunny! So for this 4th time i put it back on Sunday again. And THIS!!! Shit.

Michelle and Tianwei came today, hasn't rain yet. But there were signs indicating that its coming oready, dark clouds and abit of lightning. So we went outdoors sceptical... Tianwei and I feel that we shouldn't play cos we dun wanna be struck by lightning. But Michelle says, "Won't one lah. Won't be so suay and get struck one lor." then BOOM!!!! The loudest thunder I have ever heard for years. And the lightning kinda blind us for a second. I tell ya, Our knees went weak immediately lor. I dun even tink I can hold my racket properly.... Let alone hit the ball. And Michelle Shut up. She went straight indoors. So did we.

Ever since this gal started working, I haven't hit a single ball.. pathetic. Im dying to lor.. I mean imagine.. From 2 -3 times a week to ZERO. Its torturous u noe. And I tot at least we have weekends but no.. Not even weekends. Saiz... My skills will deteriorate and eventually I will play like a beginner again.. I hate that and I dun want it to happen. Tennis kakis are so hard to find, anyone plays tennis? I dun mind even if I have to travel all the way to Jurong man~

I wun give up. Will be trying my luck again on Saturday at an earlier timing. And if he goes against me AGAIN, I'm gonna curse and swear at him like shit.
Safely indoors of cos....
I'm the Kiasi kind.

2 Stop.

2006-04-08T22:31:00.000+08:00

1st Stop

Italian Restaurant

A Glass of Cabernet - $10.00
A Lava Cake - $13.00
A Charming Italian Boss - Priceless. (She Has A Crush On Him)

2nd Stop

M.O.S.

Entrance Fee - $12.00
Fantastic Music - Priceless.
Stinky Crowd - Worthless.
Group Of Strangers Cheering You On The Floor - Queerness
(At Least I Din Get A Boo Boo)
Cutie Dance Partner - Scandalous.
Yummilicious DJ - Precious. (I Have A Crush On You)
Bottle of Martell - Free ah!!!! (Woo hoo!!! Cheers!! Applause!)

Last But Not Least:
A Great Buddy, A Great Company - Meaningless
Yes.
It would all have been meaningless without u my dear fren.
Michelle, thanks.
Thanks for hearing me out.
Thanks for tolerating my kao bei shit even before the night started.
Thanks for reminding me that we should be enjoying this very night and not let any other distrupt that.
We Sure Did.

So what if its only 2 years! Not many can go through this much together even in 10 years!
May there be many 2 years to come.
Cheers.
Cheers To You.
Cheers To Me.
And of Course, Cheers To Our Dear Tai tai.
(Though Shes Always Busy Wif The Letter M :p)

Welcome To Jo's Workplace!

2006-03-31T01:24:00.000+08:00

It's fun!
It's exciting!
It's War!

Yes. Open War. Young vs Old.
There was actually no war, but then it began as a silent war.
Eventually, it’s now an open war.

Office politics, it’s everywhere you might say. And I certainly know that too.
But I didn’t know that even temp staffs are not spared.

Let me introduce you to a few people from the Gang of the OLD.

As you can see from the diagram below:

There’s

Queen Bee – Known to be the silent killer, the slippery snake and the woman of many masks. She gets her lackey to do the dirty work. On the surface, nice, friendly and polite. In the back, you should know what. Doesn’t offend anyone face to face. Protects her lackey and knows when to make her move. Kills with bloodless sword. Creepy sia... But in the end, she still has to stay in that position even if she wins this war. I don’t see her getting the chance of promotion. :p lalala…

Lackey – The gossiper. Tells tales, fabricates stories about you if she feels you’re in her way. Very thick-skinned, and thinks she’s somebody cos shes the right-hand woman of the Queen. All she cares about is herself, as long as she finishes her part she doesn’t fucking care if the way she does it affects your work. Bloody slow in doing stuff. Because she is so damn slow, and she gets nervous easily, people get the misconception that she is really busy. Confront her when she makes a mistake and she can turn it around with an attitude and make it yours. Even though you were just trying to help, she’s always afraid that you’ll take her job away even though she can’t cope at all. She’s jus so incapable, except for the gossiping part. Si bei gan GOOD ah!

Footnote: She’s really the one who pisses me off the most. Cos I truly feel it all started with her. Sometimes, I really feel like slapping her in the face. When I first joined, I really thought she was nice, she even taught me some of the ropes to some things and I thought people jus misunderstood her. Time really tells it all. Whenever she pisses me off, I think this to myself, “Forget it. She’s a 30 something with 40 something wrinkles and skin. She’s STILL not married and she doesn’t even have a stable job. Forgive her.”
Yup. The most ironic thing of all is that she’s just a part-timer. I can see her striving hard to be a full-timer though. I mean, it might just happen. Since she used underhand means to turn herself from a temp to perm. So, nuttin is impossible.

Loud-Lard – Came into the picture the latest. But wow! Already making impacts. This, is an interesting character. When she jus arrived, she was quiet like a mouse. Little did I know, while away from my USA trip, the elephant in her surfaced. Now, she’s the loudest person in the whole office. Trumpeting with her trunk, calls all those above her “Mum” and “Sir” or “Love”. And either ignore those below her and diao them at times or bullies them. She’s really really rude to a harmless colleague of mine, and I have seen her insulting a guy from the other department. He left the office the very next week even though he was new. Wah… Powerful.. She thinks she’s cute with her little actions, loud words with her Hongky accent and boot-lickings. But com’on, I dun consider degrading oneself to a maid, cute. She’s a forgetful person. She forgot who taught her the ropes, she forgot who was nice to her when she first arrived. Now, she turns around and abuse this person with words, and snaps at her whenever given a chance. I really feel sorry for this girl.
I’m not the one. I’m the one she ignores, but if shes not pleased with Kris and me, she doesn’t confront us like she does to chipmunk. She purposely makes loud sacarstic remarks to her OLD gang, making sure that we hear it. And yea, she always complains to our superior about us. She always looks at the time whenever we arrive or leave and peeks/spys over to see what we are doing every now and then. [Figured I would wave at her the next time she does that] Given any chance, she’ll complain to the listener or superior. So fat thought we can’t see ah. Siao!

Footnote: Shes really rounder and rounder. Can roll like ball liaoz.

The Listener – Well, nuttin much about her, nuttin against her. She just listens to her gang members, doesn’t say much. Think shes rather neutral, but I can see her agreeing wif Lard once in a while. Not surprised that she’s brain-washed. Imagine a person complaining about the same people to you everyday. Don’t tell me you wun be affected. It’s rubbish. I know she doesn’t really like us too, but I dun blame her.

Gang of YOUNG

Chipmunk - Always kana bully by…. Everyone??? Including Kris and me. Wahaha… Very blur. Have communication barrier (The kind whereby will stutter when she tok or jus kip quiet on things till u clarify wif her. Tok more will die kind). You are still our fren lah har. Plans to leave... She got long term plan one ok..

Shihui – Leaving

Selena - The Lucky gal gets the priviledge of cross training in another department.

Kristen (temp) – Leaving

Jolene (me: temp too) – Leaving

Conclusion - We are all nice people. The End.
I’m a bitch wat… k lah. I admit Kris and I are not often punctual. But we, team of Young, are damn efficient can. Jus because we use less time and finish the work fast, able to chat and do work at same time. People think we are eng. Wat shit. You are slow not our prob lor. Anyway, without the gang of the young I would have died. We are leaving not because we lost. We are leaving cos we are going for greater heights in life.
No point wasting time over these *Toot* *Toot* people. ROT there u maggots! Wahahaha......

It's Hard To Control Myself

2006-03-15T01:46:00.000+08:00

Ever had this feeling?

You just cannot control yourself.

You know it's wrong but you just go ahead with it.
You know it will hurt people but you jus go ahead with it.
You know it will hurt yourself but you jus go ahead with it.
You know it's not good but you jus go ahead with it.

It's hard to control your

temper.
feelings.
urges.

It's hard to abstain from

temptations.
addictions.
curiosities.

In The End,
You just want what you wanted.
You wun noe it hurts till it hurts.

Head over Heart?

Heart over Head?

It's your choice.
Or
Should I say sometimes you just don't really have one?
Cos sometimes you just can't think or you choose not to think.

P.S.
This just suddenly hit me.
No wonder they call it FALL in Love.
Cos you simply can't control a fall.
When you fall, you fall.
End up hurting yourself though.
But of cos, Wounds will Heal and Bruises will disappear.

Another note:
Not that I'm in one. Just what I feel and think.

Things You Often Hear or Say In A Relationship

2006-03-01T00:38:00.000+08:00

"Hello, where are you?"

"Hello, what you doing now?"

"Hello, I'm with my frens doing ____ now"

"Hello, call you when I get home."

(The above 4 feels like I'm under probation.)

"I Hate You!" (Just found out not long ago..)

"You don't love me anymore!"

"I'm not your priority anymore!"

"Your friends are more important than me!"

"You are not spending enough time with me!"
(When you are in fact seeing him/her 5-6 times a week. Siao!)

"Why are you always like that?"

"Can you not do this to me?"

"I don't need this now."

"You just don't trust me!" (We not stupid)

"Exams coming, will be rather busy during this period, can't see much of you."
OR
"I've got to work, will be rather busy during this period, can't see much of you."
(So wat can you do? Accept it.. They can do it to you, but you can't do it to them. Selfish Pigs!)

(Watch some movie and he declares love)
Example: Star Wars, "My love for you is like Anakin for Padme." (Brrr.. Cold....)

"Let's get married when...." (which freaks quite a few of my frens out)

"I'm sorry."

"Fuck You!"

Funny though, "I Love You" makes it all up for the above.

Reminder:
If "I Love You" or "I'm Sorry" doesn't work anymore, it just simply means that it's time to let go.

P.S. Not that I'm in one, it's just what I hear all the time.

Monkeys In Blue

2006-02-23T05:49:00.000+08:00

The gorilla's next step, Lemme guess....

Blame the Referee!!!

Again....

Extra Extra!

2006-02-21T00:56:00.000+08:00

Leaf Bigger Than Human Hand!
Head!
Hand??!!

Bo liao?!

Precisely why I'm doing this!
I'm damn bloody bored!

Boo hoo hoo!!!

"I Wish I Knew How To Quit You"

2006-02-16T23:50:00.000+08:00

Question.
If You Could.
If You Do Know The Way To Quit.
Would You?

I guess..... It's the Will, Not the Way.

Wonder Whip

2006-02-16T00:58:00.000+08:00

Hello, I'm Wonder Whip.
My mistress is Jolene.
She brought me to Elijah's house for a V-Day Eve Party on Monday.
I brought joy to Six people throughout the night.
Everyone was happy using me to whip each other.
I had fun whipping the Asses, Hands and Feet of Jo, Mich, Val, Leland, Glenn and Edwin.
Though I would very much like to whip Mr Vainpot's butt, I couldn't, cos he was sick.
He needs sleep so that he has the energy to use his rose petal XXXXXX for the next day.
I worked long hours but was glad the six were having a high time.
It gets better when they gulped down a few drinks and couldn't even count properly.
The game of whipping.
That made the V-Day of the Century.

I'm now taking a break at home.

For more details on the game, Please call my mistress at
1800-get-ur-ass-whipped.
And Please.... This game is in fact with your pants on.
Duh!
Whip Whip for that thought!

Life After...

2006-02-03T01:01:00.000+08:00

It's been about 3 weeks since I got back from the US. Nothing much has changed here. Life's kinda back to what it use to be. Cept that Kris has been complaining about how much my memory has deteriorate and that I'm an old woman who gets tired easily, always wanting to sleep early. But it seems like the late hours are creeping back on me, cos I have been sleeping rather late these days. Jus like before. It ain't a good thing though, but I guess thats the way its gonna be. I miss the the trip in USA alot. And I decided to list the things(random order) I will miss. So here goes:

1) Waking my 2 bitches up every morning. Same 2 responses everytime.
a) Karyn: "Duo wu fen zhong.. (5 more mins)" she really keeps her promise and shes up in 5.
b) Michelle: Whines... "Mmm.." Have to either hit her butt OR shake her real hard to wake her up after TaiTai is ready. Then..... Sits up and whines yet again "I'm Hungry...."

2) Clubbing
a) Not like the clubs are wonderful there but just really enjoy the crazy nights with no curfew, dirt cheap drinks and wonderful music.

3) Crash Parties
a) Crashing at the penthouse of the 2 Drukens cum Vainpot cum Ba Zhan. They offer a big room with lots of alcohol, fun and games. So much laughters in that penthouse. Simply miss it.

4) Being Vain To Look Chio
a) Yes. Everytime before any party or function 3 women in a room will start asking each other "Is this top ok?" "How do I look?" "Help me straighten my hair." "Borrow your eye liner" "Borrow your blusher" "Karyn, is my eye line ok?" (Tai Tai is the expert in make up. Shes our Xi Fu [Master] ) Karyn answers by saying, "Hmm... Let me help you.." and wa la! We are chio.

5)The Weather
a) I luvvvvvvvvvv the weather!! So cool, so cold, so nice. I misssssssssss the weather! I rather freeze to death and look like a dumpling than be toasted alive here lor. Yucks! Sticky, sweaty, smelly. Argh! Can't take it.

6) Smirnoff Please!
a) I luv this drink to death! If its sold here, I'll be addicted to it and eventually be an alcholic and be sent off to Rehab Centre. Ok.. Gone too far. I know they sell the dry ones here. But the ready mixed gassy little bottles in the US ones really tasted like heaven. So many flavors all taste so good. I can have six bottles in one day over there. Guess not anymore. Grrr... Good lah. I save money and I save myself.

7) Walking on the streets.
a) I can walk the whole day out on Streets. Just feel so comfy and all. Looking and exploring each and everyone of them with curiosity of a kid.

8) Snow
a) Dun have to explain that. Its SNOW!

9) Driving
a) Though I oni did it once there, I just can't stop thinking about it. Driving..... When can I F***king drive here??! I have a car at home you know! Dun ask me why can't I drive here when I DO have a licence. I'm pissed... :8

10) Vulgarities
a) Hokkien ones. (Michelle is an expert in this department) Where nobody there bloody understands a single word it meant. And they can even mistaken it for "Happy New Year!". Hows that?!

11) Roller Coaster Rides
a) You can only get pathetic ones here. Hmm.. Do we even have one?

12) The People
a) Not the Americans. Who cares about them. Its the friends I made over there in OKC. It all started there. I knew so many people so much better. From "Hi " and "Bye" (sometimes not even that) to "KNN, drink more and dance lah" "See you on Wed, etc.." Or bitch on people amongst them. Cool.

13) The Scenery
a) Pacific Ocean
b) Wichita Mountains
c) Sunset
d) Snowing

14) Shopping!
a) Though I said in random order. This shld really be at the top half of the chart! "Nice...." Buy! "Cool...." Buy! "I'm broke..." Still Buy!

15) Living with my 2 bitches.
a) I'm the mum! I wake them up, I cook for them, I open up bottles lah, can food lah, packet food lah for them (They call me Hercules), I throw Mummy Temper, I kick them when they wanna slack with the trip, I make plans, I remind them, I warn them, I scold them. They took it all. Good or bad. Boo Hoo... Bitching sessions stil continue over here though :p

16) The luggages
a) This is where we curse and swear most. 3 women 10 luggages! And every bloody Hotel or Hostel we stay in has to have staircase! We have to carry them one by one, sometimes two by two all up! No help! WE did it anyways. At the same time... there are funny moments. We had quite a few good laughs when the luaggages were towering over us.

17) Amnesia
a) You can just forget all the problems, the people, the reality and just have FUN the way you want it. Thats really the best thing throughout this whole trip.

END

Ai yah... After saying so much.... I'm back here. What the hell!

Last Stop. San Francisco. Best Stop. San Francisco.

2006-01-15T22:04:00.000+08:00

San Francisco. So small yet has it all. Had a wonderful time there.

I saw the sunset at the Pacific Ocean. It was cold, but we just took off our shoes and off we go. With the 2 uncles helping us to hold on to our belongings. Its Ocean fight!!! Mich got really wet in the end and had her Ass freezing off through the night. All thanks to me.. But its all for fun lah bitch. I mean Mich. U suggested it anyway. It's just so beautiful there. We jus watch the sunset in silence. Breathtaking....

We went to Castro Street. Its the street full of rainbows. Rainbow signs, Rainbow flags, Rainbow shops, Rainbow movies, lalala... Yes, its the street for gays. Men with beard and tummy holding hands, hugging.... Edwin and Glenn didn't believe me when I first told them about the Rainbow flag story till we hit the street by accident on our way back from Pacific Ocean. Glenn said he can't tahan and feel like punching people. Haha..

We still shop like crazy even though we were really broke. Actually its me... Im broke but still buy stuff that I can't say "no" to. Karyn wasn't broke, so she can afford to buy. Taitai is loaded can. Mich din buy much in SF cos she bought loads in other states liaoz. The lady wif 10 bags. TEN! And taitai bought 2 pairs of shoes from NIKE town!! They look so good!! Mich and I can only look on helplessly as she pay for them. We love the shoes....... But they jus don't belong to us.. Karyn, look out. I might jus steal them from ur home one day man. Bleh! I'm jealous! The golden pair of NIKE.

It's dinner in Man Zai restaurant at Chinatown almost every night. San cai yi tang meal is able to feed 5 hungry ghosts at a low price of 20 bucks. We go there so often that even the boss and waiters recognize us. We were just handed the San Cai Yi Tang menu on our third and last visit.

I drove in USA. I drove!! Ain't that cool. After so much insults from Mich on my driving ever since I drove her sunny some time ago, she finally let me drive! And ahem.. I did a better job can. We were all so uptight (especially me) when she drove. She missed about 3 exits cos she was going too fast and she braked till (according to her sweet directory man) our heads are nearly coming off our necks. Anyway, compliments to the 2 uncles. Glenn was giving me clear and good directions and Edwin was always saying "relax... We'll jus take the next exit. relax.." So I relax lor. Drove from Oakland to San Francisco, going through Bay Bridge. Nice. Feels great!

We were lost most of the time. Trying to figure out where we are and stuff. Once u hear vulgarities from the front seats you know that the 2 uncles has got us lost again. But still, kudos to both of them. Its a funny sight to see them trying to figure out where we are. Sometimes they take so long that I jus wanna say "Why dun you just pass the map to Mich?!" Dun wanna hurt their Ego. The longest time we were lost I tink its about 1 hour. They were trying to help us get to 'Birkenstock' cos we gals want to. :p We finally made it there at 8pm. But, the shop closes at 6pm. Damn!

We watched 'Kingkong' in SF too. The other 4 nearly demanded a free meal from me. They din like the movie. I admit its slow... But hey! Its a classic wat.. The director captured every emotion and the skull island scenes were rather nerve wrecking. They let me go in the end.. Phew.. Would have been even more broke otherwise.

We went clubbing. And it was quite a frightening sight. Horrible in fact. 90% of the crowd were Asians. Nothing against my own people. In fact I was quite excited to see them till.... Here comes the scary part. I saw a super fat woman with red hot lipstick slapped on her sausage lips with a face that oni her mother will love dancing like Chucky the doll.. Eeee.... Totally turned off. I saw a short short woman, about 1.45m wif legs around a 1.8m man. Shes "humping" away on top of him(With clothes on of cos! I can't even bear to say the word "dancing". Thats how bad it is.). My goodness! It really is like Hobbit trying to have sex with King kong. Brrr.......! And the rest, believe me, they were just slightly better. HAiz.. Another disappointing night.. But its funyn lah. I laughed mostly through the 2 hrs. Or is it 1??

Fisherman Wharf. We took the boat ride around it. There the Golden Gate Bridge, Angel Island and Alcatraz, etc.. We saw lazy seals, lots of them laying down sleeping. We shopped through the whole of Fishermen Wharf, we got chauffered for dinner after that. Cool.. Ain't it.

Oh! And we love looking at the different unique houses in San Fran. They are just so cute and exquisite. Love it!

Thats about it in San Francisco.. In all, we had a relaxing and beautiful time in San Francisco. Expecially Mich lah. And Only Tai Tai and me know why..

I,m Now In San Francisco,

2006-01-07T17:51:00.000+08:00

I'm really beat. It's late here and its only my first day here in SF. Went to Chinatown. Its kinda cute. Bought quite a few things and had 2 chinese meals. Yummy. Proper Chinese meals! We were so touched. Tell u more when I can. FOr Now, I'm beat. I'm gonna sleep in this pathetic teeny weeny room. The 2 gals in the lower deck are fast asleep. TIme for the upper deck gal to head to bed. Good night.

L.A. A Something That Really Is Nothing

2006-01-07T17:26:00.000+08:00

Hmm.. LA.. I din expect much from this place cos I have been there before, I know what its like. This trip has confirmed to me once again that LA is not a place for me. I think without Universal Studio and Disneyland, I wouldn't even think of visiting that place. We did had a good time there though. Walk of fame was kinda interesting. We tried to get in one of the hottest club there but ended in one small pathetic next to it. Cos some big star was there being stalked by paparazzi. I dunno who. Oh... And we happened to see Jamie Foxx at one of the clubs too. Paparazzis there as usual and they took pics of so many stars which we jus stare at each other not knowing anyone of them till Jamie Foxx appeared. Shaiful and Alexander went crazy and became one of the paprazzis suddenly. Silly boys. They were so excited. Its a funny sight.

I have to comment that the hostel we stay in is fantastic. Its in Melrose and the room is pretty neat. The beds are one of the most comfortable since we have been to USA. I nearly forgot to tell ya abotu the most impt thing of the trip! We watched Chronicals of Narnia here!! In El Capitan Theatre! Its a fantastic experience!!! Unforgettable. Its unlike your common cinema. The theatre is set up just for Narnia, its got the props exhibiting, Its got the set in the cinema itself, its got a pre-show performance. Where a gentleman played some wonderdful music before the show offically starts. It cost us USD13 each for the movie, but trust me, its well worth it. Kudos to the movie too! Simply fasinating.

Besides that, LA is kinda boring..

P.S. Its so infuriating! I jus can't find that Brad Pitt Star! Have to make do with Tom then.

Viva Las Vegas! The City That Never Sleeps

2006-01-07T16:54:00.000+08:00

Las Vegas is fantastic! I love every single hotel on the strip! We took hundreds of photos and we spent the New Year count down with a Bang! I saw beautiful fireworks and we greeted all around us "Happy New Year" no matter we know them or not. People in Las Vegas seemed to be enthusiastic and friendly. Wonder if its the alcohol. Cos everyone had at least a bottle in hand that night. In fact, not only during New year's day, these people are just there to enjoy. But its reall a very addictive way of living. All fun, no worries, no work. Everyone looks happy. Not really a proper way of living but who doesn't want to indulge in it. We did quite a mean thing to one of them on New Year's eve Party. Its really not a nice thing to do, but its hilarious. Can't tell you here cos I might jus put ourselves in trouble. Wanna know? Come ask me personally. We laughed till we jus couldn't stand straight. Courtesy of Mr Shaiful and gang.

I won 60 bucks while playing jackpot. With not my money. Mr Glenn's money. He gave Mich and me 2 bucks to keep us busy or should I say to stop us from doing silly things. Cos we were kinda flooded with beer. In return I won 60 for him, and I got half of the share. Nice. "p Mich was too drunk to win anything. Haha.. She whines like shit when shes drunk. Yucks. And Karyn jus lay down like a baby. I'm still the most sober one among the three k. I tucked them both to bed.

We took 2 rides n Las Vegas too! 2 vigorous rides! THe big Shot and the roller coaster at New YOrk New YOrk. Big Shot really shot us up into the sky at the height of 112 floors and I got to see Las Vegas at its most beautiful! Breathtaking view. I screamed and laughed at the same time. Dunno how I did that. The roller coaster ride was great too! Its really one roller coaster ride. We went up, then vertically down then sideways. At a really high speed. And every turn it makes, Michelle curse and swear like theres nobody around. All the vulgarities you can tink of, she said it all. KAryn taitai screamed at the loudest. Screeching.. As for me, thanks to these 2, I laughed and scream at the same time again. All the way somemore! Ouch. My tummy hurts.

The only regret, we missed Grand Canyon. Too bad..

In all, I still love Vegas!

Goodbye Oklahoma

2006-01-07T16:38:00.000+08:00

It's the end of school trip. Many were sad. Its hard to say goodbye to each other. We wun have the chance to have this much fun together in such a big group again. Its kinda of difficult to leave quiet old Oklahoma. Cos all of us made it alive. Everyone has to go their seperate ways and back to life as it use to be. NOt a nice feeling. I teared when 3 of us parted ways with Preeya. She blamed me for spreading my diesease to her and she teared too. I'm so glad this trip brought us closer to this nice, crazy, superbly fun woman with silly little jokes. The gals from China, Deborah and Melissa are great company too! Its cool. Till we meet again babes!
Till we mit again.....

Miss the shopping. Miss the clubbings. Miss the stupid games we play.

Goodbye Class 2005.
Goodbye Oklahoma.

It's HER Birthday.

2006-01-07T16:25:00.000+08:00

We gave the crazy gal a Birthday that she deserved. A surprise party. Mich the Bitch. Karyn's and my bitch. So are we to her :p Its her 21st Birthday. She was so surprised and touched that she can't stop squeezing her own face with her two hands. She got quite a few pressies not only from us and had a "Happy Birthday Chio Bu" cake. How many people can have that man. Wonder if the ang mos knew what it meant when thay made it. hmmmm....

3...2...1 Fade Up Cam 1, Open Mics, Q Talent

2006-01-07T16:00:00.000+08:00

TV production is really a cool module. Did not expect myself to be this madly in love with it. I guess so is everyone else in the class. From Cameraman to audio op to VTR to floor manager to Assistant director to technical director to director and to Talent. We have done every single one of them. Every single one is important. Its really team work that counts. And we are all closer to each other after that. Nobody's jealous of nobody. everybody is helping everybody. We all just want everything to work out. We all want a good show. Indeed it was a fantastic one. Tough job. We are all proud people. *clears throat* Director Seah and Talent Host Seah here will like to thank my crew. Call me hao lian I dun care. I was chosen to be whatever I was to be.

Three Cheers to all of us! Hip Hip Hooray!

Wild Christmas!

2006-01-07T15:24:00.000+08:00

Its a wild Christmas eve! In fact, its the wildest Christmas I ever had. Almost everyone in the class were there at Edwin's penthouse. We ate non stop, played like children and drank alcohol as if its water. Proud to say I prepared all the food, ok... most are microwavable food, but still....! And alcohol is provided abt 10% by us and the rest by the hosts. Its like never ending, wonder where they get that much from. Argh... they are alcholics, they will think of anything. It's wild fun anyway!
We played so many games and did loads of dares! Karyn had to shout "I Love Martin Yeo!!!!" in the middle of the road, Preeya and I gave each other a lap dance (Shyam, please dun break my neck), Shaiful and Elijah had to grind each other, Donna and Huiling now officially known as Ba Zhang had to kiss each other's butt. Theres many many more, its darn hilarious! We played Indian Poker and everyone had a chance to drink the ultimate mixture except lucky me. Phew... Or else I have to be dragged home like Melissa :p We had a Christmas Pressie exchange too, it was nice. This wild Christmas party lasted through the night. All thumbs up!

On Christmas day itself, there wasn't any celebration. Instead we played different sports with the guys. Soccer, basketball and netball. It was great! Haven't done much exercise for the whole trip lo. Fats are getting on to me, its irritating. Anyway, I scored 2 goals can! We won the game from 3-0 to 3-4! Lady of the match speaking here. Cos I'm good at stealing balls, it's what you call tackling. lalala.... Oh! And taitai is damn hiong, dirty player sia. Elbowed me in the chest, and with her iron sheen, hurt Glenn, sending him out of the game. tsk tsk. Michelle's good at passing and has a bag full of tricks that doesn't work most of the time :p Regarding the boys.. duh.. Not gonna say how good they are to boost their egos. But I can tell you Elijah has the worst shooting in basketball (he shoots the ball over the board) and he plays soccer with his hands in pockets. That boy is a joke. I guess thats what make him a fun companion for all of us.

Christmas is just different this year.

Seven

2006-01-07T15:20:00.000+08:00

It's been so long since I blogged. Din really get the chance to. And so.......... Yes! I'm gonna do seven different blogs at one time.

Dear Oklahoma....

2005-12-21T13:02:00.000+08:00

Dear Oklahoma,

It's been 12 days since I'm here. You weren't exactly nice to me but you weren't particularly bad as well.

I wanted a penthouse before we came, but I ended with a studio instead because of some irresponsible people who backed on their words. Now, I'm glad I ended in this small but cosy room with 2 of the best room-mates I could ever have. We were always looking out for each other, making sure that everyone is taken care of all the time. We stay in harmony and I simply love them both. It couldn't have been any fun without them.

Just on the second day, we were already waiting for our transport we were promised at the Wal*Mart entrance, but it never came. It was a torturous long wait of 1 1/2 Hours. In the end, we had no choice but decided to try our luck out in the open with a trolley of 2 weeks grocery, hoping we could get a taxi. We called the person in charge for help but she said theres nothing she could do. Five gals were left stranded out in the cold with the trolley out on the road junction, with weird looks by passerbys, after another 20 mins the taxi we called finally came. I was really pissed at you and your people. But after we got home, we unpacked and I was really glad that we got what we needed and everything was in place. The shopping at your huge supermarket was actually pretty pleasant.

We popped by the strip club just opposite where we lived on the third day. It felt a little weird at first, to be surrounded by naked women and hungry men, but it slowly turned out bored. We left promptly after 30 mins. I saw how men actually enjoy the cheap thrill, and also came to know that a lap dance cost 20 USD each. And... they do it on women too. I nearly got forced into paying one to do it for me but I escaped. I saved 20.

The very first module my group was arranged to take was Environmental Science. The lecturer is a nice lady but the lessons were really too boring. I fell asleep almost every single lesson(except during group work) no matter how I struggled to stay awake. But the field trips we had were wonderful. We have been to the stinkiest place, which is the sewage system but we also went to the place with one of the most beautiful scenery. The wildlife park was wonderful. Unforgetttable.

There were a total of 5 groups, 91 people, for this study trip and we were the only ones ended up being forgotten. Everyone has got their student cards and graduation gowns before hand except for my group. We ended up worrying about wearing crumpled gowns for our graduation day, and indeed it happened. We didn't get our gowns till the very day cos the Person In Charge said theres nothing she can do. Although we did ended up in wrinkled gowns, the troubles seemed to float away the moment we put on them. Everyone was helping each other with their hats, tussles and gowns. Making sure we all look our very best. We had fun taking pictures, congratulating each other, all looking smart and formal.

And it's weird that everyone has got all their past assignments back and it's only me with the missing one. Again I was told theres nothing they can do. It seems like your people can't really do much on anything.

The post graduation party at Bricktown was wild and crazy, but ironically you left me crying and pouring my heart out to my only sober friend after the partying. And of cos, we had to settle a sad, drunken friend who couldn't stop mumbling before she slowly slipped off to dreamland. Do bless her cos she deserves so much more and better.

I'm kinda broke too.. Thanks to all the fantastic shopping you have over here. 'Ross' has the cheapest and best things around. And the outlets in Dallas really burnt a hole in my pocket. Too many shops, too little time. I was rather sad when I couldn't find 'Hollister'. I knew it was there but I just can't find it. However, when I got back and took whatever I bought out, everything look so good. It's worth the money. No regrets.

The visits to the lecturers were great. Especially the one to Dr. Ellen Jane's house tonight. She really made an effort in preparing a wonderful meal for us. We were singing Christmas Carols and I just found out Elijah, the vainpot, plays great piano. Woo Hoo.. Surprise surprise. I should really learn to know people better.

You opened my eyes too. I have learned not to judge too quickly. Those who always appear to be cool, ain't that cool after all. I heard so much, and they apparently suck in many ways. Those who suck, still do suck. No matter what, I'm glad that during this trip I got to know those whom I don't really communicate with initially much much better. They apparently are rather nice people, can be fun and silly too.

Dear Oklahoma,

theres still 10 days with you. Still a long way ahead and much to learn. I look forward to it, and will stay strong. Theres really not much more to ask from you. I miss my family. So just do bless them with a wonderful Christmas this year.

BTW, thank you for the snow. Its Beautiful.

Yours Sincerely,
Jo

New York New York

2005-12-10T13:49:00.000+08:00

I'm here in Oklahoma now as I'm writing this. Jus finished with the New York trip and this trip is like some sort of an amazing race. It was rush rush rush all the time. But we had great fun. All five of us. Karyn, Michelle, Preeya, Huiling and Moi. So many funny and silly things we have done. And so many problems along the way. In the end we conquered it all. If I were to write down the full details of this trip, think it can simply take up the whole page, so I guess i'll just highlight on a few things, which, let me remind u, is still not gonna be short.

From Singapore to Tokyo to New York. It was a long tedious flight. And I felt like a glutton, cos all we do is eat, sleep, watch video, play game, eat, sleep. Horrible, felt as if I put on a few kilos even beore i stepped into United States. We had lunch in Narita airport during transit, cos we figured out that we wouldn't be having Asian food for a long time to come. And so, we enjoyed the short Japanese meal during our 2hr stop in Japan. Finally after another 12 hours of flight, and irritating screaming kids torturing my ears, we got to NY. Karyn and Michelle was jumping up and down like shaken up coca cola when they saw the snow right outside the plane as we landed. They were like 2 children who didn't get their sweets when they realised that it had stopped snowing by the time we arrived, what we saw was actually what I would call "leftover snow". But they were still thrilled to see the snow at least.

The hostel we lived in wasn't too fantastic, nothing fancy, rather squeezy but it was good enough. The location itself beat all other things. We were just 5 mins walk away from Times Square. How cool is that?! We planned our tour to many places for each day, although in the end we accomplished maybe just about 60% of it (Most of it was due to the delays from umm..... shopping?), we had a great time. We explore this cold city with a map in hand and off we went, on foot or taking the subway. Credits to Michelle, our professional map reader. She provided all the directions due to her talent in map reading. HAha..

We saw wonderful architectures like the New York library and the St. Patrick church. I was really amazed by such detailed work from just the bare human hands. You really have to see it to feel it. We visited the Statue of Liberty as well, it was the most unforgettable and coldest trip for us. I swear I nearly lost my ears when we took the ship there. Freaking cold at the top of the ship, but we gotta see the most beautiful scenery. We even had a snow fight right in front of liberty. We saw snow and we jus started attacking each other. We were dorks... Haha.. but it was hilarious. Went to the fifth avenue too.. Lots of the rich and powerful. Limousines pass us by for like every freaking 5mins. I really suspect the people there just have clothes for lunch or dinner. We couldn't find any food at all along the way except for branded shops, and almost everyone is holding at least one shopping bag. oh! and I saw the Trump Tower. His "Trump Tower" was plated in Gold. Eww......

Hmm.. New Yorkers are practically as cold as the weather. I feel it's not racism or anything, they jus have an attitude problem. They are just being..... New Yorkers. Simple as that. If you think the service in Singapore is horrible, come to New York, then you'll know Singapore's Service ain't that bad after all. We had problems druing the trip, realised our irresponsible, stupid, idiotic, no brainer, scheming agent got Mich and me a different flight to OK. We argued wif the bitchy agent for like hours so that we can make that change without having to pay. Mich did most of the arguing, and boy! She was really good at it. In the end, we din manage to get what we wanted. We still have to take the early morning flight instead of the noon one like the rest. We were really pissed. We got up at about 4.30am to catch the flight and guess what! It jus suddenly snowed!! Now, we were really perked up and we couldnt stop looking at it. We went out with the snow falling on us. It was a wonderful feeling. We even stuck our tounges out to taste it. Preeya started with it. Eeeeeeeee..... Haha..

The trip in New York ended with the snowing and we thought it wasn't so bad after all.. It was all worth it. We forgot the the problems we had with the tix. When Mich and I got to the airport, we realised our trip was cancelled due to the snow storm. And.. we were automatically transfered to the noon flight which is the one the other 3 are taking. How nice... We nearly fainted on the spot. The noon flight is seven hours away for your information. If we were to wait, the 2 of us have to be stranded at the airport for that long. Fortunately, this kind lady at the counter (which was rare), got us tix to OK early, but we have to transit at Minneapolis. We never even heard of that place before! But we dun really have a choice.

To end this, let me tell u about the five people of this trip.

Karyn - Always nice, like a lost, curious, excited little kid in a big city. Always losing things. Doesn't know her way. Very blur.

Huiling - an auntie always on the wrong frequency. Always interpret our conversations into something that we can never understand. And shes got a really contagious laughter! A funny character. Doesn't knowe her way or even the adress of the hostel. Very very Blur.

Preeya - Always crack tickish jokes, a fun person. Blur, but compared to the above 2, shes much better lah. Haha.. at least she knows the way back.

Michelle - A PIG. Always hungry. Gets cranky when shes either tired or hungry. Always looking for food. Takes about 6 meals a day, which she says its very little compared to what she takes in Singapore. The time she wakes up is the time shes hungry.

Jolene (Me) - Always thinks she lost her stuff but finds it somewhere eventually. Took people things and slips them in the back pocket and think shes returned them in two occasions. Makes idiotic jokes.

This Party of Five Had The Best Time.

What Is This I'm Feeling?

2005-12-06T00:40:00.000+08:00

In another few hours time, I'll be flying to US.
Boy.. Its finally here. It was just like yesterday when I first met TaiTai and Mich. We were talking non-stop about the trip like excited little girls. Now, after 1 1/2 years, it has finally arrive. So much has happened during this period, how time flies. Certain things have changed for the 3 of us, though least for taitai, but its just all so different. Especially for Mich I think, I'm more like in the middle. This trip just simply reminds me of how time can pass at the blink of an eye. Unexpected do happen without us knowing.

I feel rather weird now. Though many said, " You must be excited!!". Its really not only that. I'm excited of cos, but at the same time I'm nervous (yes, I'm having cold feet and my hands are trembling at the same time as I'm typing this), happy, sad and I'm missing my mum and dad and Bret Boy already. This is not my first trip without my family, but it just feel so different this time. 1 1/2 month without them, no mama's good food and I'm so far away... Boo hoo!!!! I'm very confident I'll be just fine in USA, and hey! We did everything for this trip on our very own! From planning to flying to the staying and the damn troublesome Visa. Everything's going as planned and it all seem so perfect now. So I'm really independent enough base on that! Haha.. ok.. Enuff of bragging.

I just feel so mixed up now.. Hmm... And one weird thing I just found out is.... I expected myself to feel a certain way for a certain thing (I can't tell you what), but it actually didn't happen. So I think its good. It's a good start. In the end, I just hope this trip is gonna do me good, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Wish Me A Safe Trip. And,
Bon Voyage To Myself!

See You People In 2006~!

Love,
Jolene

Liar Liar Pants On Fire.

2005-11-26T02:25:00.000+08:00

Two Dramas today I watched are about lies.
One is on impulse, the other, a long plotted one.
One hurt the victim, the other, created hatred and anger.
One makes me feel its stupidity, one gives me the chills.
These tell me that lies don't last.
Cos they were all uncovered in the end.

Makes me wonder. What is considered a good enough reason for us to lie.
Theres the white lie and the lie lie.
But ain't all lies for the benefit of ourselves?
And what makes us think that the lie is a white lie, that it won't hurt the person who's hearing it.
We lie all the time, but I guess it doesn't last.
Best to keep it under covers our whole life, but life doesn't work that way.
Too many I have seen and heard.

Lies and Deceits, they make us see.
In fact, its a clearer picture once unfold.
Seen anything yet?

1 - 0

2005-11-07T23:55:00.000+08:00

Yes Yes Yes...
I'm gonna write about the topic that everyone is talking about.
Yes Yes Yes....
I'm gonna write about Soccer.
Yes Yes Yes...
I'm gonna write about the Red Devils vs Blues.

Firstly, Woo hoo!!! Way to go Fergie! Good old Fergie, the wily old fox.
He has beaten the so called "Special One", but he didn't shut him up. I guess no one can ever shut Jose up. Unless, he loses his job i think.

I'm proud to say Manchester United has slapped Chelsea right across the face with a 1 - 0 win!
You can curse and swear at me if you want to, Blue Fans. The fact is that, you lost. Someone just needs to diminish the arrogance of this team. Look at their behaviour whenever they lost, it's jus anger and frustration but no reflection.

A friend once told me, he feels that Jose has the right to be arrogant. I agreed at first (that was when I felt traumatized and ashamed by the Middleborough n Lille performance from the Devils). But Now, after some thinking through, it's a Big "NO". Not at all!

If anyone has the right to be arrogant in the football arena, it's Alex Ferguson. Someone who started with nothing but made a club into something. And, may I remind you, for 19 years. When Fergie took over Man U, he wasn't slumped with loads of cash by some Russian billionaire and given permission to buy any player thats top-notch. When Fergie took over, there wasn't any star players to start with. Fergie made Man U a legend and last night he created a miracle. He's a Wizard. Jose sets a 4 -4 -2 formation to oppose Man U's. But alas! Who would have known, Fergie changed his plans (I guess that was in his mind before hand), it's a 4-4-1-1. With Van Nisterooy and Rooney in the middle, Fletcher and Ronaldo playing wide left and right, Smith n Scholes as center Mid-field, the defence stayed back and crossing good balls when necessary. Rooney certainly had all the space to roam freely making beautiful passes. Smith threw himself at any threatening balls thats apparent, Fletcher closed in to the opponents, tackled any ball he could, and of course scored what many would call a lucky goal. But the thing is, he scored. Thats all that mattered. In the second half, the Red Devils were indeed defending most of the time till Park arrived. I wouldn't say Man U played extremely well last night, but they did what was necessary. They played with all their hearts and souls. That was what was missing since the start of the season. And Boy, am I glad it's back, and I hope it will never go away.

When it comes to mind games, Fergie is the man. He showed his boys the tape of Kean's infamous interview, where Keane criticised the boys like a strict Father, playing the "bad guy" role. Fergie, did not. Instead, he played the loving Mother role, he didn't criticise his team nor any other opposition in the open (if you know what i mean) . He chose to encourage and it worked. The devils were woken up by the brutal reviews but also knowing that they were not given up. That, I feel is truly what made them play.

Of course, the win over Chelsea doesn't mean that Man U is invincible now. They do have problems to solve. Their ball deliveries and finish do need to be polished. Ronaldo needs to be less greedy, decrease his falls whenever he's being tackeld, do less of his dancing and concentrate on distributing quality balls. Smith can't be Roy Keane overnight, he's a striker for God's sake. Give that man a chance. He needs time to adjust, although he did a good amount of defending, as a midfielder, he will need to gain more experience and work on his vision for attacking purposes. O'shea should just stay at the back and Ferdinand needs to stop thinking about money. If your memory is working, Rio, who the hell would pay you 100 thousand pounds per week out there! Park, he's good but he just needs to work on his finish. Rooney, I have nothing against this boy except for his temper. He's a bull, push him hard and he won't move an inch, he's hardworking and he played every game with determination. He's already a world class player to me. I really can think of no one when it comes to taming this hot-headed lad except for Ferguson. He has his ways when dealing with his boys. Yes, Rooney did silly things here as well but comparing it to his Everton days, this is nothing. I can imagine how worse it could be if he were still at Everton or any other clubs. Lastly, the team needs another striker and midfield, Scholes has aged obviously and Van isn't as sharp as before. Cruel to say, but it's time for some changes, some people just needs to go. It's for the love of the club that I'm saying this.

Ok, enough of Man U. Lets talk about Jose and his blues.

If I'm not wrong, Lampard, Cole, Terry, Gudjohnsen, Makelele, Gallas plus some others were not bought by Jose. They were chosen by the previous Manager(I can't even remember his name, sorry about that). Poor guy, he just formed the team and was sacked even before the team could settle down. I really felt it was unfair. Anyway, yah. Jose didn't buy any of those. Duh... These players are now considered the best Midfield and Defence. Yes, I admit they improved under him, but hey! He wasn't the one who found them. The previous Manager wasn't given time. Who knows, maybe these players might just improve over time and experience. Jose did however made a good choice in Ferera and Del Horno, but Drogba. Com'on.. He's not that great. He's just Big and full of complaints indeed. In terms of shooting, even Lampard is better. He can practically score goals at any angle. I would even choose Crespo over that yucky gelled, oily head. And.. Look at Wright-Philips, he was brilliant during his Man City Days. Here, hmm.. Jose didn't make him better, instead, his performance seemed to be sliding. Oh! Jose you were really great in comforting yourself by saying that the margin is still wide and you have nothing to worry about. What a way to encourage your players! Hats off.. Don't think I'll be sued, cos he's probably too busy being the pacifier of Arsene Wenger, who should also shut his trap and think about what he should do if Hendrie really leaves. Of course, Jose does deserve credits to what Chelsea is today, but I would like to remind you, as the saying goes, "the ball is round". Anything can happen in the field. Look at Wigen, they are second in the table. Who would expect that?! Arsenal went 49 games unbeaten but totally broke down after a lost to Man U. Will history repeat itself? I really don't know, but I feel the next Chelsea game will tell all.

Maybe Chelsea really ain't affected at all, maybe Man U or Arsenal may catch up. Theres just too many maybes out in the field. Maybe Wigen will win the title! Kaoz... I did say the "ball is round" but I didn't say that the "World is flat"!

P.S. I caught a glismpe of Solksjear! Aww.... He's still so cute. Just a reminder that I'm a girl alright.

None of My ******* Business

2005-10-28T01:39:00.000+08:00

I received this in my frenster message.

'
hi jolene>>>!
actually u dont know about me. im just curious coz i search on frenster...one of my favorite name... "XXXXXXX" i saw a pretty girl from her picture on this site and i want to connect with her but my problem is i cant send message to her. can u pls help me to ask her if there would be a chance 4 me to be her friend... it's just fine with me if can be friends in frenster...please??? ", anyway my name is VXX CXXXXXX MXXXX from the Philippines. here's my email ad ... VX_cXXXXX@yahoo.com thank you very much in advance jolene. pls regards me 2 her, ok?... ", thanks and take care
'
Ladies n Gentlemen.... Let me present...
"Desperate HouseMan"

As If I care. I've got better things to do pimp.
Get a maid would ya.

I Feel Weird

2005-10-19T00:11:00.000+08:00

Was on my way home from the MRT.
A woman came standing next to me.
After a while everyone turned to our direction.
I took out my earpiece, thought maybe my MP3 was too loud.
Realised it wasn't me.
The woman next to me was reading Buddha Scriptures aloud to herself.
Put back my earpiece.
Felt a little weird suddenly, as though I have sinned.
Then found it amusing, couldn't stop smiling to myself.
While she's reading her scriptures, I'm enjoying the Hiphop blast from my MP3.
"I'll Take U To The CandyShop, Let U Lick My Lolli..." Oops!

Shan Zai......... Shan Zai................

Wednesday Night - 05 Oct' 2005

2005-10-11T00:48:00.000+08:00

Mich Was Drunk, Jo Was Drunk, Pam Was Drunk.
Jo Was High, Mich Was High, Pam Was High.
Pam Was A Joker, Jo Was A Fool, Mich Was A Clown.
Mich Fell Down, Jo Fell Down, Pam Fell Down.
Ouch.............Ouch......... N ...........Ouch

Plus 2 Ca-Le-Fe :

Robert Almost Hit An Irritating Goblin.
Martin Was In Love With The Bin.

The End.

Summary:

We Had Silly Fun

Beautiful Bali

2005-10-02T01:30:00.000+08:00

Wow. Just got to know that Bali, (Kuta) got bombed not too long ago.
To think that I was jus there a week ago. Had a rough week so din really have the mood to blog till now. Guess Kris n I got lucky. We were blessed.
Because, not only we got lucky, we actually had a great time there.

Yup, I promised to make this a wonderful trip for myself n tell u guys the good things about Bali, and so I did n I'm gonna share. Forget the fact that it just got bombed for the moment.

I had the time of my life, I really came back quite reluctantly n somehow couldn't really adjust myself to Singapore for now. Guess I couldn't accept the fact that I'm back here, kept wishing I'm still there. Leading the carefree life, wearing very casually, just shorts and tank tops walking sloppishly down the road and shop shop shop. Explore this nice little island, and experience new exciting things.

The people there are friendly, they luv to socialise and damn!! Their grasps for language is darn high. They could speak Japanese like its its.... chicken feet (couldn't think of other words)! Some could speak Chinese too, and of course English. No need for me to say, u should know its because of the tourists there. Mostly Caucasians and Japanese. We were mistaken as Japanese so many times or Taiwanese sometimes just because our skin is yellow. It's like no other Asians ever visits that place. Weird....

Kris n I gotta know a really nice local tour guide, Pande and so took his van for a 30min ride to Nusa Dua for the sea activites. Oh! On our way there, we stopped over at Hilton Hotel for awhile, its really beautiful. Feel like punching Paris Hilton in the face cos I can see her money all over the place surrounding me. Some people are jus so &$%#&$%#$ lucky. Ok.. this is about the trip, not some @#$&*#$. There I go again....

While we were at Nusa(no black sea for ur info),we went Paraskying, which Kris went berserk about like a kan cheong spider before taking off cos she has phobia for heights. She landed with a white face looking lost, like her soul's not there for about 15mins. (Think she will kill me if she reads this.) Then we went snorkeling, which I swear with a mouthful of the seawater, chances of contracting Kidney disease immediately shoots up! But it was a great experience lah. Got to see a few nice fishes, many but not a wide variety of them. But Boy! Were we glad to see the Rainbow fish. Its beautiful and it meant alot to us. After that, it's Turtle Island! These turtles are so so cute, despite of their sizes. Theres the super big one which i tink if he lands on me i will jus die, then theres the 2 week old babies, which are so tiny that Kris suggested that we steal them back here as pets. I got to hold the snake, the bat and the Pelican! How cool is that!

After that its shopping shopping shopping. We jus take our own sweet time lazing, strolling, buying, and enjoy. Love the shops there! They have really cool brands and unique stuff, espcially love the surf shops! About the food.... yummilicious! Cheap and Good. We came across a restaurant, 'Bubba Gump Shrimp Co.' . Concept from Forrest Gump. The atmoshphere was so lively and the food was fantastic! Couldn't ask for more. And we practically jus went mad in their retail shop. We also went to this Posh reastaurant where we ordered the platter for 2 which seems more like platter for 4! But we finished it anyway, don't ask me how. For the atmosphere and the food, u've gotta at least spend above SIN$100 each to have that here lor. But nope, we spent only about 25 bucks each. Wahaha.. Jeolous??

Oh, and we did Spa massage while watching the sunset. Unforgettable.... The massage was so shiok too that I could just fall asleep.... Zzz...

I can't tell u all everything, but this is most of it. Hope u enjoyed, cos I did.... :)

P.S. If, I'm saying IF I do go back to Bali again, I will defintely learn surfing! How can I not?!

Bali Bali, Here I Come.

2005-09-20T02:29:00.000+08:00

Yipee ya ya yipee yipee ya. I'm gonna be at Bali on Wednesday, which is real soon..
I'm darn excited can. Ok.. I'm over reacting.. Bali is so near.......... some of u may say, but it's been so hectic these days that I dun give a damn about it. I jus wanna go there n relax. Yes, though most of the things I heard about Bali were mostly negative.. like ...

1) The sea is black
2) The sand is not white
3) Its like a beach in East Coast (just bigger)
4) Its not safe
5) Theres drugs everywhere
6) One of the highest chances of being a terrorist attack spot

Yup, above are all what I heard about Bali. Ai yoz.. where are all the good stuff about it??
I decided that I will be the one who will bring all the good things about Bali n tell it all to U people can! I dun care how much it sucks. I paid for it n I WILL enjoy!

Doesn't matter if the sea is black, It's an unsual sight can. Black sea! Woo hoo! Doesn't matter if people come appraoching us wif drugs, cos I dun take them! I'll be alert, careful, n gif whoever offers me drugs a buzz off look! or rather F off look! All of the above I will just accept it. Take it as it is n make it an experience. Even if its gonna be a bad one. I will make it the best 'bad' experience. At most I dun go Bali again lo..

I will return safely n happily.
See ya people!
Still...
Bless Us Both! Haha..

P.S. Self Psycho: Bali Is Good, Bali Is Nice, Bali Is Beautiful.
Bali Bali Bali

Broke

2005-09-08T23:55:00.000+08:00

I'm Broke.
Throw some money at me (A few hundred at least) , I don't mind.
I'll pick it up.
Tsk tsk tsk..
Where's my dignity?
Thats how poor I am can!

On The Sur-face

2005-09-05T01:40:00.000+08:00

Finally, I'm freed! No more bloody exams for until at least 2 months! Ok.. I have an assignment to pass up but duh! I'm not gonna touch it till at least 2 weeks later.

Really rewareded myself with shopping, having fun and sleeping for these few days! Sleep, I was so deprived of it, now, I can finally catch loads of beauty sleep all I want. The shopping part was a sinner, I'm supposed to save but i still ended up splurging. Grrr.... But I'm happy with the things I bought lah. Thats for being a woman.

Anyway, this blog is about Double O on Saturday night. Hmmm, I was practically conned to going there. Abit of a being forced?? Haha.. Cos my friend, Mr Heng, said theres gonna be R n B but alas! It was retro all night till the very pathetic last hour then the Hip Hop lor.. It's a Retro Night for Saturday. Kaoz.. I omost died, seeing older people dance (not that im young, but still...) and me trying to blend in with the crowd. I tried to enjoy myself N i eventually did cos I tink my Jap fren, Hitomi, whom im suppose to bring around did.

Before I stepped onto the dance floor and as I was feeling sulky about the music, I started to observe the people in the club. Everyone seemed so happy. They danced, they played games, they laughed, they drank like theres no tomorrow. R they really Happy? Or was it only that moment? Or.. Is it just a cover-up? I found myself to be one of the answers. I was happy during some moments, but when I stopped, hmm... It's not that I'm sad or to the stage of being depressed, just that my mind was occupied with stuff that certainly doesn't make me happy. "Why? On a night like this?", I asked myself. Ain't I suppose to be enjoying myself after the examination struggle period? When Hitomi and I headed to the ladies after some boogying, we heard cries from one of the cubicles. It was a really sad one, that girl, I didn't get to see her. But it's like I could almost feel her sorrows. She was crying over the phone to someone N yah... Really felt kinda sad for her. Come to think of it, at least at that few moments we were happy. Better than being sad all the way right?

Everyone has a story behind that face. Or should I call it SUR-face? I guess it's a matter of reading the story non repeatedly to yourself or let it go if it saddens you and move on to another book. One that makes you happy n Smile :) whenever you read it over and over again.

Anywhere Is Paradise

2005-08-16T23:59:00.000+08:00

A friend sent me a really beautiful song. Thought I should share.
So there you go...

Anywhere Is Paradise
'
Some people wanna live in a big city street,
so crowded and noisy they can't hear their heart beats
Some wanna stay where they been a long time, others kinda like to keep moving around
But baby, I could live near or far, anywhere between here and some shooting star,
as long as I'm always where you are.

Cause anywhere is Paradise when you're with the one you love,
Anywhere is a place that's nice when you're with the one you dream of,
Anywhere is Paradise when you're with a love that's true,
There's nowhere I'd rather be baby than anywhere with you

Some people wanna be where the big money is,
some wanna be in Hollywood showbiz
Some gotta be where they know what things mean,
others just wanna be where they can be seen
Well baby, anywhere for me will do,
anywhere between here and the far up moon as long as I'm always there with you

Anywhere is Paradise when you're with the one you love,
Anywhere is a place that's nice when you're with the one you dream of,
Anywhere is Paradise when you're with a love that's true,
There's no where I'd rather be baby than anywhere with you

Your heart and mine joined together like hand and glove
We already found our forever,on earth as in heaven above
So baby, anywhere will do for me for wherever in the world we'll ever be will always be the land of love

Anywhere is Paradise when you're with the one you love,
Anywhere is twice as nice when you're with the one you dream of,
Anywhere is Paradise when nothing could be more true,
There's nowhere I'd rather be baby than anywhere with you
Anywhere with you,yeah...Anywhere with you...
'

End

May You And I Find Our Very Own Paradise
SEEKER

I Missed You

2005-08-08T03:53:00.000+08:00

You were gone for months. I knew u were gonna come back but I still missed you in the end.
I missed the excitement you bring.
I missed the many characters you display.
I missed the beautiful skills you exhibit.
I missed the times you put me at the edge of my chair.
My weekend nights were bleak without you and it seemed aimless at times.
Nothing to look forward to.
Though I did had my fun without having to spend time on you, I still miss you so.

EPL (English Premier League)
You're coming back! AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LUV YOU

*Umm... Turned off?? I din ask for you people to read this lo. But It's truly How I feel... Forgive Me? :p*

Oh! And I miss the men. Slurps.. Fabregas, You're so cute!!!
But thats not the whole point!
It's The Love of The Game.
I'll be waiting for your glamorous return.

Project Projects || Exam Exams

2005-07-28T01:08:00.000+08:00

Darn!
Why Can't Schooling be easier?? Can't they just not give us projects n exams? Can't they just not torture us?? I'm sure schooling will be more fun without all these shit.... *shifts legs*
ok.... I'm being childish. But my exam is like next Saturday, Project is due then too. N I have one bloody Japanese Language exam on Monday. N............... I haven done any of those preparations yet. Haven't lifted a finger. Urgh... Can only blame myself. I really want to do them, but i just can't. Y is it always so damn difficult? I admit thats its laziness but damn.... The engine jus wun get started.

Just did some research earlier on, *Guess the guiltiness is working n the deadline nearing helps too* found out the product that i wanna do doesn't have much information. Not a teenie weenie helpful. No wonder it's not doing well! Idiots. Have decided to change my topic, found my way out! Screw the Beer!

I'm cursing n swearing, it's not gonna help but who cares! Just makes me feel better. I wish all these will end soon so that I can go have fun!

Yes. I'm still a kid. Never denied that.

Welcome To Sin City

2005-07-18T01:42:00.000+08:00

Welcome to Sin City.
A City of Slaughters, Lust, Hatred, Love and Survival.
A City where everything and anything can happen.
A City of Black n White but with tinges of beautiful colors now n then.

Is it because we live in such a colorful world that we miss out the beautiful things right before our eyes? Only when the world around you falls apart and becomes colorless that a certain something becomes beautiful. Is it because it brought you hope Or is it then u realise that you missed out the beauty all along?

Everyone Sins and Sinned.
Sin for a certain someone or something.
You may feel its worthy, Others may find it stupid.
What are you fighting for?
Some cross lines without even realising it.
Some know there are lines that cannot be cross but they still chose to risk it all.

Sin City.
How Ironic.
Ain't we living in it already.

Climb! Jolene! Climb!

2005-07-14T00:16:00.000+08:00

I have fallen into a hole so deep that I can't see whats out there. I need a pair of hands to pull me out cos im surrounded in darkness n somehow has grown use to it. I have even come to the stage of leaving this hole in reluctance. I actually hate it but I just can't leave it. So use to the darkness that even when the lights hit, its still darkness that I see. Or rather, I chose to be blind. A fren said the only way to free myself, is to climb out of the deep dark hole on my own. She said that if there ever was a pair of hands, I'll be dependent on them n it's unfair to hold them just to save myself. Shes absolutely right. Smack! Truth n Fact right in my face.

Do we need any truth at all if theres no lies? It will only be a fact. On the condition that theres no lie. If theres no lies, theres no need for any truth at all. Don't you think? Confusing? The bottom line is, I dug the hole myself, I lied to myself n practically burying myself. Time to burst the bubble.

Move on Jo, Get over it.
Attach -> Detach -> Be Free -> Be Happy.
My Goal for now.
Though I'm now still in Stage 2, I'll play this mind game against the biggest challenge. ME. I'll get to the very last stage. I know I can do this! If You can do it, I can too! I promised n I will definitely keep it.
:)